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Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Business Gal VS Engineering Gal

I overheard the conversation between 2 gals in the bus on my way to school today.
Gal A: You know ar, recently J has started to be paying more attention to her appearance. She wore nicer clothes like a lot of long sleeves one, and put on make up also.
Gal B: Which course is she in one?
Gal A: Engineering
Gal B: Huh? Why she like that?
I was very disturbed when Gal B finished the last sentence. Why can't engineering gals wear pretty pretty nice nice? Just because she is from engineering, then she must conform to the "tradition" that E.gals wear only T-shirt and jeans izzit? Dumb dumb lor. I'm from EEE and I must say, we do have gals dressing up nicely, but yah lah, not many, just a pinchful. It's the way that Gal B said, like we dress up it's wrong. WTF... she should, "That's good, at least she's becoming one of the bright flowers among the grasses, if not see all the boring guys and gals, so sianz...", right? Agree?
I must admit our dress sense is kinda not very good compare to B.gals. There was once, I had to go to the business block, and it happened so that a tutorial just ended. At one glance, you see all char bohs wearing skirts, my friend and I, one look will give us away that we are not B.gals. LOL.
Anyway, E.gals also know how to dress up okie. Just that our school work is so much hectic than business students that we have no more energy to think, "What should I match today har?" So we just wear the easiest, don't have to think one, T-shirt and jeans lor. Official wear for all E.students. Ha ha ha.
BTW, why is it that people always compare gals? Why they didn't compare guys. Like Hostel Guys VS Home Guys, E.Guys VS B.Guys VS Other Guys. Like I said before, we also like to see handsome boys... *drool... I shall do one after exams and let all the girls happy. Ha ha ha.
Been drinking too much coffee and no water, rather scary. Coz my pee smells like coffee, YIKES! Must bring water to school liao.

Yesh! No more tough labs for me (This is very very very long entry, do prepare a cup of milo/coffee/tea and food)

Yesh! Yesh! Yesh! No more labs till next semester. All these labs make me very hungry everytime they are finished. Must use both brain and hands to work on it leh! My lab partner is already so used to hearing me say, "Wah biangz, wa eh bah tor jin yao!" (My stomach is very hungry!)
Thank god my lab partner, ZQ is very nice, and we both came from NYP, so machiam feeling "come from the same family". Yesterday, during our last tutorial, there were only 五只小猫 including me. Our tutor was commenting on some polytechnics, coz he wondered why are we so weak in AE (a killer paper somemore, fuckanana, must study like bible liao). So he asked AD, who was beside me, then LL(not the LL we always cuss) who was behind me. Thank god he didn't ask me coz what he said later was rather embarassing if he did. The scenario went like this:
Tutor: Did you all learn all these in poly?
3 of us nodded, 2 of us bochap (easy to guess who didn't nod hor)
Tutor: Which poly you came from? (asking AD)
AD: NP
Tutor: You? (pointing LL)
LL: SP
Tutor: These 2 polytechnics are good, coz they are old, right? (What he means was these 2 polys are very well-established as they are among the oldest polys.)
At this point, ZQ and me we looked at each other and a bit want to laugh but cannot laugh, thinking, "Yah lah, NYP very young, 10 years niah, of coz cannot win SP & NP lah"
Tutor: NYP not very good, too young. (Disclaimer: Tutor say one, not me ar, don't say I say NYP bad, I'm just churning out what he said!) Do you think so? (asking me)
Me: Dunno (shrug shrug, and trying to gek my giggles)
Then ZQ and me looked at each other again and we almost bursted out laughing, gek until buay tahan. When the tutorial ends, we went "wah lau eh, don't have to compare until like that mah, YKIK can liao!"
Just now during lunch, we were discussing about FYP. LL told me before that she did a very high standard project in SP, that is they wrote a book on MOSFET for a university somewhere in the world. Cheemalogy siah... ZQ find their standard really very high compared to us. I won't say my project standard is low coz I did use my brain to do it (digress a bit: during my FYP , the time spent was: 40% play, 30% sleep, 30% project. Yah, I know, very slack, BUT I lose weight during that 3 months leh, so very stress also k... lol), but ZQ from another course, said his supervisor helped him a lot. Cannot compare like that lor... anyway, we both agreed that NYP is ***** and really *****. (Figure it out the 2 invisible words yourself lah, haha.) Reminds me of a lame joke that I heard on my 1st day of school:
SP=Sure Pass (No wonder)
NP=Never Pass (Got meh?)
NYP=Not Yet Pass (-_-"', okie lor)
TP= dunno, that guy forget, anyone of u know, tag it on the side, k?
In case you wondering why my tutor said until like that (very frank and didn't fine tune his words), that's because he's a PRC. No no no, I'm not against PRC. I must say, they are really very smart and nice people. Smart because EEE has a lot of PRCs (be it students or professors) and they find EEE "like chicken feet" (EEE professors of coz find it easy if not how they teach, dumb me. Yah lah, I'm dumb. Duhz...) while we find it "like shit". Nice people they are coz they a bit "pang chance" (i.e. give chance) to students, like I hearsay, (hearsay one, not I say) that our Physics lecturer was very lenient in marking the quiz that all of us (i.e. in my tutorial group one) all passed. Heck! How could it be true? I didn't do 50% of the questions and the rest of the 50% still got to kanna cut also (he told us the answeres so we roughly can gauge how much we get), yet he said all passed. See, nice people hor?
They may be nice, but one thing I cannot tahan is their English (or Mandarinish, like Singlish you know?). Come on lah, dun say I talk bad about them. How many of us could actually understand what they taught? Even if they speak perfectly without grammar errors but given the accent, chances that we can understand is maybe 50% , i.e. you either understand or you don't. It will take a while for us to fine tune before we can grasp the content of the lecture, without having to frown at every sentence they said. My vocabulary is already Pte Ltd, not to mention them (unless they study English Literature here which is harder than striking 4D), anyway, EEE dun need powerful English vocabulary. OK, I'm losing my point. What I'm trying to mean is, English is not their mother tougue, their mother tougue is Mandarin, so they speak with an accent they also cannot help it, but they should improve their sentence structure and prononciations. It's really terrible when we encountered professors speaking Mandarinish (Hmm... maybe Oxford dictionary can add this to their next edition and pay me a sum for copyright since I invented it and I'll be rich!). Let me tell you my own encounters.
As you all know the algorithm quiz I had yesterday, mind you, all 3 professors are PRCs. I havent seen the 3rd one yet but hearsay he's very jiat lat. Never mind, I will grade him when I see him tomorrow. The 1st professor, wah lau, attend her lecture will make you so high until you feel like slapping her (my roomie said one ar). May I ask you to pronounce this: Data Structures. Done? Good. Easy right? Da...Ta... St..ruc..tures.... You know how she pronounce? Date Structures. It surprise me how she can pronounce the St..ruc..tures so perfect but Data as date? I thought the r is very boggling for our tougues, that's why my mother, chinese educated, pronounce r as l, like Japanese like that, example: "blick game (brick game)". Here's another one, tougher, Algorithm. This one my mother dunno can't be help, that professor, she said, "Al...Go... C...ma". WTF? The way she said "Al...Go... C...ma" pissed us so much that one guy 敢敢 shoot her, "Algorithm lah!" Wah ha ha ha. She speak Mandarinish so much that she is rather challenged in understanding us. Once, a guy requested the tranparency to be shifted a bit to the left side coz the part of the equations on the right were blocked. He said, "Ma'm, can move the transparency anot? cannot see". Dunno if she was trying to be funny, she replied, "Cannot see ar? C is here. " while pointing at the big C on the transparency. The whole lecture bursted out laughing lor! She still asked, "What's so funny?" I 甘拜下风!
Professor No. 2, an elderly man with a tinge of wisdom feeling. When he introduced himself, wah, very impressed, he can prononce the "Algorithm", I think he must have 混 in SG for a long time already. However, my heart died when he introduced the topic he wanted to teach, "Binary Sear-cher(Search) Tree". This fellow, nothing much coz he was very serious, he has the "不要玩玩" (dun play play) face. The only funny thing he had said was, "Are you trying to tell me that lecture has ended by talking? OK, lecture ends." His lectures are rather boring anyway.
Somehow, it prove my SQ theory that very left-brained are lingustic challenged and the very right-brained are mathematically challenged. See them, so good in maths lah, engineering lah, but didn't learn their English properly. :P
Auntie just now came to repair my blinds coz they had fallen off yesterday, and I 发现新大陆。 I can lock my blinds!!! I had always tied it to the hook, coz I thought that was the purpose. I only knew my swakooness when the Auntie pulled the string that hoist the blind, pull to the left: it moves, pull to the right: it locks. Wah... like 点穴 and 解穴 like that. As for the 4 hooks below the windows, my roomie and I had swakooly tied the strings on both the extreme left and right. How about those 2 in the middle? Oh... we hang a plastic bag on it and uniquely becomes our rubbish bin. Hee hee. Very 方便,we just need to turn 90 degrees and dump our rubbish without having to stand up and walk, (that's why my belly is getting bigger coz the rubbish I usually threw were food wrappers and tissue, hahaha!)
Phew... I have typed for 2.5 hrs (in between went to wash clothes, hang clothes and blind repair). I had wanted to just blog for about 1 hr one, coz that's roughly the time it takes for the washing machine to wash my clothes. But then, KNNBCCB lah, the 1st washing machine took 1 hr and still not yet finish. It's still spoilt despite they sent for repair. When I went up (mind you, the laundry room is at level 5 and I'm at level 2), holy ch88by8! The knob was still at where I first turn to, i.e. regular 9. KNS, feedup, change washing machine and type for another hour lor. Screwed up my plan to go Jurong east MRT station and replace my EZ-link card. Kaoz! So now I can't stop typing lor...
One last JOTD (joke of the day) before I end this entry. Yesterday, I had a short nap before I went for dinner. In my nap, I had this silly dream. I dreamt that we were having dinner (OMG, all I think is food!) at Canteen 2 when a guy wanted to know my roomie. He even offered to take off his T-shirt right in front of us, just to get my roomie's hp number. My roomie had a bf, so of coz refused to give but dunno how to reject. So, I very brave and tell the guy, "你愿意脱就脱,但我们不愿意看!" and I woke up, stunned. So while I was relating the story to Roomie, she said, dreams are opposite of reality (I also know), maybe in reality a guy will ask me for my number and offer to take off his clothes. Yah yah, like real, then she started being funny and said, "Maybe it's you who will go and take number from other people hor, hee hee". "Yah lor, then I offer to take off my tee and that guy said, '你愿意脱就脱,但我们不愿意看', right?" And we laughed like mad cows.
I sweared that I won't sweared so much in my next angry entry. My fingers will auto pilot to "KNNBCCB" when I'm angry. LOL. Wah!, Tired, shall go and nap le. (^_^Y)

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

I feel like banging myself to the nearest wall...

Today's quiz was very easy, compared to yesterday's other class, our class got the easiest paper. I bet many of us sure get full marks for it, except me... I SCREWED IT UP!!! TAMADE!!!
My answer was correct, but I got so unsure when the time is ending soon, and I started to think my answer was wrong and I went to change it!!!! ARGH!!!! I kept pulling my hair after the quiz... so pissed.. so so so angry with myself.
I shall start my revision, so that I'm fully prepared and confident for my coming exams. Please bless me to have the stamina to study. I want to see Apples, not Donkeys in my results.

Highly Important Matter

To the school, please clean your ears before I deliver this important "speech". Ready?
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KKNBCCB lah! Stupid school! Stupid fucking bus system! Why got road block we dunno? Made us waited for freaking 15 minutes, you know how important this 15 minutes is to me, someone who has a bloody algorithm test today?
This roadblock matter off aside. Why change the bloody bus routes, increase the frequency lah! So what if you increase the fleet of buses to 12? A simple maths calculation will tell you this does not help at all. You see, in the past is 8 buses 2 routes, but will route the whole school. Now is 12 buses 3 routes, 1 old route, 2 new routes. Out of the 2 new routes, only 1 route will be fully utilised (I don't see many future-to-be teachers in my hall, so the other route is deemed very useless.) Now I can only wait for 1 bloody bus who will take the old route and this bloody bus will have a bus full of students and lecturers. Alternative? Walk for 10 minutes to another bus stop. You siao is it, I pay amentites fee and you ask me to walk so that I can take a bus? Ha ha ha! Very funny. The bus that route around the the 2 "spinal cords" will also be full what. Walk my way to school? Pay money still must use my legs, NO WAY! Silly reasons like can lose weight, tone muscles, train my stamina, are totally out coz I come here to study, not to lose weight, and the study stress is enough for me to lose 1 pound a day.
I know the new routes are to compensate the old ones, coz too many ch88by8 people also think like me, "pay money liao so must fully utilise", and make the bloody bus squeezy every morning. Since you buy new buses, why not make it simple? Instead of 5 minutes interval, make it 2 minutes lah. So simple, you don't even have to waste money to print new routes, print new anouncements, save effort putting the new routes on pillar, save effort telling the whole world that "Hey! Bus routes changed!". Not fair to those who do not stay near the old bus routes or no nearer bus service other than walking a fucking 1km to the nearest one? Blame on the ch88by8 architect who design the school lah. We already become hillbillies liao, still got to climb like monkey here and there.
Like that cannot claim the amenities fee which 99% is into the school's pocket? You so smart, sure can find a way to extort these money from the already paying-school-fee-till-no-money-to-eat students.
Phew...Thank you for listening to me.
Note: I'm just bitching because the waiting pissed me off and like I said, I have a test today, so let me bitch to destress can? The new bus routes are still "on trial" and the final verdict won't be out till much later, must see how students respond to the school first . The above mentioned is just to complain and let steam off, as you all should know, we like to kao peh oni, won't really get into any action. "The mouth speaks louder than action". Last paragraph is meant to be funny(coz sch fee is very high), no real comments here hor. Better make myself clear if not my blog kanna close down.

Joke upgraded

I'm not sure if you people have seen the flash version of this joke, but anyway, have fun reading:

有一天, 魔王把公主抓走, 公主一直叫。。。

魔王:你尽管叫破喉咙吧!没有人会来救你的。

公主:破喉咙~破喉咙~
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and you thought it ends here... no...
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没有人:公主!我来救你了!

魔王:说曹操曹操就到!

曹操:魔王, 你叫我干嘛?

魔王:wah lau! kua dio kwee liao! (哇唠!见到鬼了!)

鬼:靠! 被发现了!

靠:胡说!谁发现我了?

谁:管我屁事?
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魔王:Oh! My God!

上帝:谁叫我?

谁:没有人叫你啊!

没有人:我那有?
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从此,魔王精神分裂。。。

I am so damn boliao... kua~ kua~ kua~

Letter to the random ICQ horny fuckers, fakerdonis, and goldfish

(Please ask a bimbo to read this mail out with those baby talk accents that I can't mimick the rest of my life)
Dear ICQ all above mentioned,
I think ICQ hor, 来来去去 machiam the few of us using leh. Recently, I had deleted some of you who did not chat with me so regularly, like only once and never-see-you-again kind, you know (eyes blink blink blink, eyelashes flutter at hummingbird's flying speed). However, each time I delete these kind of useless contacts, you silly dickheads will start contact me again, so irritating you know. From a woman's point of view, the moment you stopped talking to me, there's only one reason: I'm fugly and does not meet your requirements for dunno what the fuck also lah. I thought, well, never mind, I wasted my time talking to you but me being a very very very (exaggerate it and shake head left-right) nice person, shall forget it THIS one time loh. As usual, once I delete you dickheads, you all will start messenging me again leh, but then hor treating me as a new chatter. No wonder there's this phrase to describe you silly guys, "Man think with their heads below". Hee hee hee (bimbo's laughter), SO.................... funny and true hor. A little advice: Yes, the heads below are small, but I believe you still could use some of remaining your "brain" resources to think of other things other than fuckng right? I'm sure remembering one nickname takes up like 0.0001% of that pitiful brain(up/below)? Hiyoh, it's so irritating to repeat myself one you know. Since you must have seen my ugly self, that's the reason why you stop contacting me right? Why? I'm not hideous enough to let you remember and ignore me forever har? Then how? When I see your dumb nick, I know I chatted to you before and most probably had added my friendster account. This must be where you concluded that I'm too hideous and stop contacting me leh. So sad, now chatting with you all also must be pretty, if not cannot chat. Anyway hor, you all are so dumb that you don't even know that I've chatted to you before. So don't be surprised if I can tell you how long your dick is, although universally standard is "6 inches" for you all hor. ICQ stands for I Seek You, now it also takes on a new meaning, that is I'm Sick of You. So do not be displease when you feel that I'm talking in a harsh way, coz I dislike silly+dumb+empty+horny dickheads, like you all dislike chatting fugly chatter like me.
Love, Hatako (ICQ #: 50175620)

Monday, October 03, 2005

I love Dove Hair products... and Fat vs Thin

Ever since I finished using the hair conditoner in hostel, I didn't buy any new one coz I'm a poor student mah. Anyway, I also have a lot of hair products not used yet. Like J&J baby oil, The Body Shop Ginseng hair ___ (can't remember the name), a Jap product hair oil (with ceramic). I had both the BS hair cream and Jap hair oil in my hostel, but most of the time I used the hair oil only after bathing. So I didn't use hair conditoner for about 2 or 3 weeks. My home had the Dove conditioner, woah.... It was very good leh, when I wake up the next day, my hair still had the smell, so nice, and is straight, not like curly worly (except the right part, curl like those indian's moustache) Unlike in the past, my hair always smell weird (just weird, buay cao okie) ,like my pillow's smell had "overpower" my head during the night's sleep. I also bought the Pantene's leave-in hair moisturizer. The last time I used leave-in conditioner was Lo'real's one, 6 years ago. So I practically had forgotten leave-in type is rather... oily? Like there's some liquid stick in ur head lah... The leave-in moisturizer is on my hair now, not sure what it will turns out 5 hrs later. Will it be smooth and silky or rough and stiff? I touch my hair now... rather smooth, but the feel is like put a lot of hair oil on my head like that. Anyway, Dove is damn good and since no one in the house use it, I'm bringing to hostel to use (to cover the damn insecticide shampoo). I love the smell when I wake up in the morning. BS one is gd when I'm going out and my hair is dry after bathing. The Jap hair oil helps to keep the frizzes, like u apply at night, the next day the hair is frizzless.
Wah sai, I realised I spend quite a lot of hair and face products... even though some are offered items. No wonder I'm poor. LOL. I am so hiao... in keeping my hair and skin(Iwill blog another time) good. Bo bian leh... must know how to groom myself since I'm fat. Those Stick Insect's hair like crow's nest, face like Mark Lee people also will find her prettier than me. KNS lah... 真没天理。
That day was chatting with my friend coz Physics lecture was boring. We both weighed about the same except that she is taller than me, so a bit 同命相怜. We were on the topic on guys. She was saying, as long as girls are slim or thin (and maybe big boobs great legs), her face is like pimple war also will have guys woo. Where plump girls, even if she IS prettier, have nice smooth skin, big eyes, small lips, everything that is deem pretty, but just because she is fat, she condemn. Yah lah, got some exceptional (and these exceptional excludes me), but the society is like that, judge on how you look but never look properly. Duhz... very late, got to sleep, I shall harp on this topic again.

Saturday, October 01, 2005

What English name should I get?

Thinking of changing my english name, coz both my sisters' english names (Jacq and Jamie) are rather nice, while my one is so orhbit, Janet (So 80's, oh my god!)
So we were discussing what names starting with J.
Jacq: How about Jeanette? Sounds close to you current one.
Me: No, I don't really fancy Jeanette Aw. Maybe French names?
Jacq: Jean (Pronounce as song)
Me: Common also leh!
Jacq: Jane, Joanne, Joanna, Joan, Joy, Joyce...
Me: Aiyoh... any more names?
Jacq:How about Jana? Since Mum used to call u Na Na.
Me: I think one of the elephants or monkeys in the zoo is called Jana lor...
Jacq: Then pick one from reality show lah, some names are really cool. From "America's Next Top Model", got Naima, Yoanna, sounds nice, but whose name start with J and is not common?
Me: Maybe I can called myself Jaguar since there is Mercedes, LOL
Jacq: I think you call Benz nicer
Me: Shi Wen Bin is called Benc, sounds too close.
Jacq: Ben-C? Doesn't that make him 笨死? HA HA HA HA HA
Me: Too bad Stephanie is taken by YY(My cousin). How about Janu?
Jacq: I rather you call yourself Jaguar.. duhz...
PZ: Jolene lor, LOL
Me: No way lor... wah kaoz... I wanted to call Chessy, coz of my nick Qi Zi. but it looks like "Cheesy".
Jacq: How about Jayni? Eh, better not, coz people will think you are Jay's fan.
Me: Yah lor...
I think I stick back to Janet better.

Piccolo Maiale Rosa


My newly adopted virtual pet, her name is Piccolo Maiale Rosa (Little Pink Pig in Italian). Nice name hor... She has been here for a day. Play with her, k! She's right at the bottom of the page.

Yaxha lost again...

Aiyoh... Yaxha lost again, what happen? Brianna, why did you stand like a stone during Immunity Challenge? You have legs, you can run, dumbo! Even Lydia made an effort to run (with the ball though, -_-'"). Haiz...
Jacq and me felt so disappointed when Yaxha lost, both in Reward and Immunity Challenges. They were so close to winning!!! Have the brawns but no brains... argh... I could almost felt Steph's agony when she slammed the rope. Bobby Jon was so funny can, he said "I'm not used to winning, this is a good sign." Wah lau eh...
Jacq said why didn't they vote Brainna out last week? She's always appear to be very inacitve one... should have sent her back last week. Maybe because she was hiding behind a screen that's why Yaxha members only noticed between Lydia the Old and Morgan the Lazy. Shrugs...
Amy hurt her foot, poot thing. Hope she recovers quickly enough to fight for Yaxha next week, she's a tough lady. Don't play play with her!

It's nice to be back home

It's so nice to be back at home, where Mama cooks nice food, a sister to chit chat with a lot of things, and a little sister who asks silly questions. It's Children's Day, so I gave my Hello Panda biscuits to Min Min. She was so happy and she gave me a little notepad in return. What a darling!
Came back with PZ today. On the way back, she asked me where could she buy a cork. Puzzled, I asked why did she need this. She said her tutor had told them to get it, each of them. "Maybe she wants us to hold it in the mouth and practise the way we articulate? HA HA HA". I thought for a while and replied, "Then you try telling people, 'I put a cork(cock) inside my mouth during tutorial!' WAH HA HA HA HA". Yeap, from there, we started cracking some dirty jokes like her group partners are both males and she joked, "My male partners, one has a cock inside his mouth and the other one accidentally sits on his cock!" :P Okie... I admit we are lamers, bleahz...
Last night I had a meeting with the other selected GLs, for we had some problems splitting up ourselves into group, coz we had 7 of us. We were holding it in L's room. L, a senior, had his club photo taken in a studio and we all teased him he was 耍帅. Then I think we wanted him to go and talk to CGL, then pointed at his pic and said, "You so man, can lah can lah" some...thing like that. He also buay paiseh and said, "Yah. I'm very man!". At this point, I picked up his blanket with a lot of cartoon pandas, pointed at it and joked, "Yah... really very man... wor!!!". He saw it and was laughing madly all by himself, the rest of the people didn't catch the joke. Too bad... LOL.
We discussed from 12 midnight till 2.30am before settled on the groups. Gosh... I was grouped with L, LY and SH. Can't wait for FOC 06 to come quickly! Hee hee.

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Argh... Silly things always happen to me.

That's it that's it... argh...
I was having a very nice nap, totally forgetting there was a room check today (They want to make sure you are following the rules and regulations). I had only slept for about 30 minutes when they banged the door like crazy. After I grabbed my spectacle and headed to the door, the auntie who had a spare key, already open the door. When she saw me, she quickly apologized and shut the door before I can respond to anything. I bet I must have scare her off with my just-out-of-the-bed look. You know, messed-up hair, rolled up tee, mouth partially open, maybe salivating a bit...
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Pic taken from http://www.kamelottkennels.com/CB/Pics/Week%204/nina-mouth-open.jpg

I wished I was looking adorable like this too.

About Online Guys

Aiyoh...yesterday's dart game was a bit crappy, I was a sharpshooter at one moment, the next moment I was out of the board. Like, I was able to hit the 2 shots of 19 (one was a triple-19 somemore), the next moment I'm hitting the softboard. My captain and senior teased me, "Wah! Why you like that one? One moment so zhai, next moment kanasai leh! Concentrate!!!" LOLx.
It was goddamn coincidental, I met my friend's cousin through ICQ yesterday. So holy shitty qiao! He was my junior in MIT too. SG is really very the small, like that can also meet friend's cousin. I also chatted with an interesting guy too. While most online guys will initiate a conversation starting with "Hi, intro please?" or "Hi, care to chat?" or "Hi, mind to chat" and all those boring sentences starting with "Hi". He did a bit of homework by reading my blog (I post it under 'Homepage') and he introduced himself as SQ216. So cute hor? It's so refreshing after those damn years of "Hi intro pls". This guy is very cute when he used "aeroplane" terminology to tell me more about him. If every guy is like him, the cyberworld will be a better place!
ICQ was one of the lao jiaos in online chatting, but recent years, MSN Messenger has won over many people due to the user-friendliness and cute functions it has, so is Yahoo Messenger. MSN brother, Windows Messenger, a built-in software that comes with Windows XP, is not at all favourable, for it's usage is machiam so old fashioned, like going back to the Stone Age period. IRC? Not really for me... I hardly use it, but I think it was the pioneer of all these chat, wasn't it?
Anyway, my main point is not about these online chat softwares, if I continue to rant on I can write an essay on it. Actually, I wanna blog to you active ladychatters about the guys we will meet in online chatting. With the increase popularity in online dating, I thought I should come up with a guide on how to deal with these different people. So, let me present you(drum rolls)
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The "Ultimate Guide to dealing with Online Dickheads"
According to my years of experience of chatting, these guys are categorized as follow:
  • Goldfish: This type is kinda irritating for everytime the first sentence they ask after the usual "Hi", is "what we chatted last time?" Worse, he ask you to re-intro again. Like a goldfish which has short term memory (3 seconds). What the fuckanaer! I think they talked to many girls at one time, asking the same thing to every lady but never bother to really remember them. Please lah guys, now almost all chat program allows you to keep track of history, so fucking use it! At least next time when you talk to the girl again, forget what you chatted last time? Check the history dude! Girls, to deal with this type, send him the "history" file if you have. Don't have? Tell him to search his brain then and add him to ignore list! I've met 2 before and they irritated the hell of out me. I am a very nice person and I tolerated until all my hair fallen off because everytime I chatted with them, I need to pull my hair, distort my face in agony and shout: Goddamnit! No wonder I'm ugly, thanks to Goldfish!

  • Fakerdonis: This bunch of guys, appear to be very gentlemen, can chat everything under the sun and there isn't any signs they are pervert (i.e. asking the girls whether they had sex or anything related to sex). Yet, the moment they ask for a pic of yours (remember to get theirs too!) and unluckily, you don't appeal to them when they see it, you might notice they will go offline immediately. If they happen to be online again, and girls, we being the most sensitive living things on earth, ask them what happen last time, their answer is very standard, "Oh! I suddenly got disconnected." Then they will procede to tell you they are busy (Shitting with the laptop inside toilet? Busy then don't online lah) and can't chat, blah blah blah. Ladies, delete them off the list immediately, for there isn't any chance they will talk to you again, till donkey years later, they might suddenly message you again for they would have deleted your pic/happen to still keep your contact but no chat/properly had a brain accident but don't remember that you were once the ugly duckling they had once thought. If they ask you for a pic again, send them an edited pic of him (that's why you must get hold of their pic), with the words slammed across their faces, BASTARD! Then SOP, add them to ignore list.

  • Horny Fucker: Most hated of all, for they are just a bunch of horny air brains both top and below looking for holes. Either they want to meet you for sex, if not they wanna have some cyber fun. To deal with those cyber fuckers, pretty easy. SOP, simply add them to ignore list immediately. But being the meanie I am in cyberworld, I have a great time pissing them off for my own enjoyment. See below:

HF: Hey! Wanna have some cyber fun with me?

Me: Fuck off

HF: Hell, I wanna fuck you. Come on!

Me: Okie, fuck you back. Hope you had enjoyed the quickie! Bye bastard.

SOP-add to ignore list.

To deal with those fuckers who persisted you to have sex with them, the best way to deal with them is to show them that you are hornier, and more hiong than them. Guarantee chop chop that they will not disturb you again. Some tactics I use are listed below:

  1. Be frank and tell them, "Want to have sex ar? Can, send me a pic of your dick coz I want to see how big they are. Since you just want have sex, I must make sure they are of good quality you know. Don't have 8 inches I don't want."
  2. Let them know you are a BIG fan of SM. You can say things like you always play a DOM and you love to pee inside your partner's mouth. There are a lot of crazy things you can say for SM is crazy.
  3. Ask him for his pic, tell him you want to see how "fuckable looking" he is. This is an indirect way of telling him you want someone good-looking. Unless he's very sure he's Adonis, most prob they will target at other girls again for they will not want to waste their time to tackle on someone who cannot guarantee them sex.
  4. Do the above-mentioned "cyberfuck".

Take note: If #3 doesn't work, procede to #1. If he happens to have an 8-inch brother, try #2. If he happen to be a crazy fan of this SM, do the #4 and the SOP immediately.

All these should be able to work well, for those adonis with an 8-inch penis will be hooking up with beautiful women at the pub, where got time to online at night? Those people are losers, they can't hook women in real life, so they search online lor.

Some of you might be thinking, why do all these stuffs when I can just add them to ignore list without going through the trouble. Well, you see, they waste by my time talking to them, just ignoring them doesn't appease me. So by doing all these, at least I'm happy knowing that I teach these fuckananers a lesson. Even if they are not pissed off, I enjoyed dealing these methods of them. Just ignoring them will lead them to think, "Okie, I'll find another one then." Must show them female power mah!

Now for the last type:

Mr Good Guy: No need much elaboration, they are totally opposites of the above-mentioned and if everything between you and him goes well, he might end up becoming your boyfriend.

Hope this is useful for all of you ladies. ;)

The author is currently an undergradute in a SG university. She had written this aritcle purely from her piont of view and hearsay she's a bit ga-ga (short circuit in her brain) due to too much studying. Blogging is her new found interest lately. Other than being bitchy sometimes to people she hated who stepped on har tail first, overall she's a nice lady who does not anyhow bite. Stay tune for her new entries in this column! ^_^

A reminder to MYSELF (hope it works though)

STOP BLOGGING AND STUDY FOR MY BLOODY EE2008! QUIZ IS ON NEXT TUESDAY! STILL LOOK! SHUT DOWN THE BLOODY LAPTOP AND STUDY!

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

some thoughts before I sleep

Was msning with my sister just now, she said some really funny things, better blog it down. Wanted to cut and paste the conversation, but didn't know that I did not activate my saved history, oh well...
As mentioned, I did not go back home last week. So I was asking my sister whether my hamster still alive or not, for he's quite old. Jacq answered rather gleefully, "Good, still alive and kicking. But unfortuntely..."
"Remind me to change his wood shavings. Unfortunately what?" I msned back.
"Don't worry, the smell will remind you. I'm using a lot of perseverance to use the PC now" (Note: Hamster's cage is just beside PC in my room)
"Why leh?"
"Your hamster's poo poo lah! Very smelly leh!"
Hahaha, I had forgotten what she exactly said, but it was so funny that I'm trying to gek my laughter coz my roomie was alseep.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! My sister is just so funny!
Anyway, recently bought a new shampoo brand starting with O. I took a whiff at it and thought the mild flower smell was very nice, and I bought the large bottle with free small bottle. Grave mistake... Should not change my usual shampoo. When I used it that night, I thought I had sprayed insecticide on my head. >_<
No wonder I'm spared from the neighbouring buggy attack these few days. LOL.

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

exam stress, thinking about nonsense things

Hee hee my roomie so nice, bought me a pack of Hello Panda biscuits when she came back. I was a bit stunned at first that she bought me biscuits like little kid, so I cheekily thanked her, saying, "Thank you zeh zeh!" Haha, and she replied with humour too, "Big sis take care little sis, 应该的。 "
Haiz... super stressed siah... exams starting on 2nd November, I hate being stress, coz I will end up eating a lot to curb my stress. Now that I'm in hall, maybe I won't eat a lot coz my room has nothing for me to eat. Maybe like that I will slim down leh... hope so, I shall aim for 65kg at the end of December. Bleahz...
It's weird not to go home for the week... Now exams coming near, the more I won't go back that often... Miss my bed at home...Miss my mother's cooking... Miss my little sister's "大姐, 你回来啦!" and cheeky smile...and my very old hamster, hope he's still alive. Haiz.... I shall go home this Friday.
Was reading Jacq's blog, a lot of thinking. It's so true of some people, always exclaim, "No lah, I didn't study for it, sure fail one." But when they see the questions, it was so easy for them I can even hear them chunkling under their breathe. If they did study, why not admit it? Is it so cool to be in the "din study" gang meh? Or they want to show to people that, "Oh I didn't study but I got good grades for it so I'm very clever?" or to prove they have Lady Luck on their side. I'm those who really didn't study but people don't believe...I really need Lady Luck on my side but she doesn't favour me. I want 10% of Einstein's brain and I will be very happy, or better make my brain like computer, P4 speed and unlimited memory and space, so that I won't forget anything. With a brain like that, confirm 1st class honour siah....wah hahahaha
The stress is making me 胡思乱想: What if I fail all my modules? What if the school kicked me out? Bank loan how? Argh...
Think less of those and use the time to study lah!!! Hmm... I should blog less too.

Monday, September 26, 2005

Poooooooooot!

所为“响屁不臭,臭屁不响” (loud fart don't smell, silent fart smell), I must say, I totally worship this sentence. On Saturday, I encountered a total of 4 farts, from 2 people. How suay can I be to encounter this? I say, the chance is less than kanna birdshit lor.
I had mentioned that Saturday was my Physics test. It was kinda difficult, for I did not study the chapter 5 and 6 thoroughly, so the last 2 questions I had a hard time figuring how to do it. While I was thinking deeply how to do the questions, a low frequency
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pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooot!
Holy crap, it was damn smelly can! And I couldn't concentrate after that and I left only tmd 15 mins lor. Tried to protect my lungs from the "poisonous gas" using my sweater, but it was so concentrated that it managed to pass through the sweater and yeah, into my lungs. Feel like fainting. Oh Gross!
Anyway, after that, I went out with some friends for a movie. While we were in the lift, one guy gave 3 loud farts! Poot! Pooooot! Poooooooooot! Yeah yeah, he said sorry watever shit, we shoot him a dirty look. But weirdly, it didn't smell. Heng ar, if not Sunday's headline will be "Poisonous fart cause the death of 3 people".
When I was in poly, I had even smelled more deadly one okie. We were having committee meeting, in this really tiny room, about the size of a storeroom like that, with AIRCON! Halfway through, I smelled something but thought I was over sensitive and didn't say it out. But when my VP (quite a tactless person) shouted, "Wah Lau, who farted?" Then I realise I was not the only one who smelled it, we hastily opened the door and caught some fresh air. The guy was damn paiseh and blushed... his one is really Silent Deadly Gas.
Not that I don't fart, but at least have the courtesy to go toilet mah, which 1 of my galfriends did that while we were at an Pulau Ubin's resort. Although later the smell still flowed out (that guy quickly denied), she got the courage to say, "It's me, that's why I went to bathroom but still...."
Anyway, now in hostel, can hear different types okie. Long one short one melodic one bombastic one any kind.
I just realised my life is full of shit and fart hor, jiat lat.

Sunday, September 25, 2005

Let Phileine teach you how to do a proper blowjob

Yawn... Finally the Physics quiz ended, but exams coming, really need to get my ass to study hard. After the quiz yesterday, I realised I'm very very very weak. I couldn't do half of the questions. Jiat Lat... :( I don't want to da bao for next semester!!!!! I shall study study study and blogging. Hee hee.
After the quiz yesterday, went to watch movie with a friend, "The Devil's Rejects". Sounds cool huh, the word "devil" deceived us into watching. This movie is the worst I ever seen. No storyline, no climax, no plot, no explanation, no yan daos, only chio bus (wat phak, we gals also want to see yan dao leh), got freaks, got ah peks, got gruesome killing scene, got aunties flirting, fuck is in every sentence, lame jokes, the suppose good guy kills more gruesomely than the bad guys, and bad guys suddenly become victims, good guy kanna killed, bad guys died in somewhat a heroic manner. What lousy superwhite movie is this? The fuckananer something wrong in his head. The director is Rob Zombie, no wonder. A Zombie's movie isn't for human viewing pleasure. Even the website is stupid, I clicked "Skip intro" so that I don't have to wait phaking long, in the end it still leads me to a flash website that needs to phaking download. Lousy show has lousy website. The sound effects was so goddamn irritating whenever I mouseover something. Wah Biangz Eh! Heng I don't have to pay for this show. It's so lousy that a couple left 30 minutes later. Those remaining are couples smooching in the dark, not watching the goddamn show and we got to watch other free shows, those loners I think wanking to Baby (the only chio one) in the dark, maybe?
One scene I find it stupid, Baby (1 of the killers, very chio) was doing a sexy dance to the rhythm of this catchy phrase, "Chi-nese... Ja-panese... See my knees" and then jingle her boobs. What the fuckanana.
I shall move on to "Be With Me".
It is a local film done by Eric Khoo, based on Theresa Tan's story. Theresa is a blind and deaf lady. "Be With Me" was actually a title of her poem. She had approached Eric to do this film. There were 3 stories which intersect in between, and Theresa will sometimes pop out of the scene. Storyline? I dunno, coz this is an artistic film, so it is meant for people who are right-brain, they appreciate such 抽象 matters. I'm a left-brained who do maths better than drawing, so I can't comment much. The show is a bit draggy (艺术的 movie 好像都是 jiang 的 hor), but not boring. According to an unoffical statistic done, the whole show has less than 20 lines. The 1st line was, "Uncle! Orh Lua Jit Pua!" (Uncle! A plate of oysters omelette!).
Up next, highlight of this blog, "Phileine Says Sorry".
This is a Dutch film, it is so damn funny. Like "The Devil's Reject", the word "fuck" appear more than 80% of the lines. However, there is story line, there is plot, got yandaos and chio bus, got nice sceneries. It also teach you how to do a proper blowjob, wah hahaha, I'll come to that later.
Phileine is a stubborn girl who nevers says sorry and she hated the word too. So all her exs were jerks till she met Max. So things were happy for her and Max until one day, Max told her that he was going to New York for an exchange theatre program with other international students, and a famous director. So Phileine let him went there.
Phileine decide to give him a surprise visit at New York. What do ang mohs couple do when they see each after long time? 一日不见, 如隔三秋。 Well they fucked lah, what else. Philene is a powerhouse, so she's quite hiong, and weird. When she saw Max (mind you, she was in a ready to fuck position, on top of Max), she said, "When I saw you, the first thing I wanted to do was to suck your dick, make you super horny ......(can't remember) and shoot me across the room but now I changed my mind." Max obviously wasn't very happy that she turned him on and now letting him play himself meh. So he made Phileine lie down on the bed, and said with a sexy Dutch accent, "Hmm.. I don't like rough sex for now, but Chinese had an idiom, 'Making Rain and Water', which sound better than rough hardcore sex, and let's start making rain with water". Phileine replied, "I don't know what 'Making Rain and Water' means, I only know it sounded damn sexy and makes me horny". Then as they start to kiss, lick, hug, I think the tap in Max's room also hot and horny and started to jerk itself and the water from it falls like rain, like that not enough, there were thunder and lightning. They are really depicting 'Making Rain and Water' (翻腾覆雨). We laughed like mad. (I must have been so engrossed that's why I din realised my pouch dropped on the floor.)
This show has a lot of funny sexual scenes, like one, Phileine and Crotch (Phileine called her this, don't know her name) were faking orgasm in a restaurant after 2 Americans shared their views on fake orgasm. The whole restaurant was looking at them. Ok, now the part on blowjob. I shall put it as a dialogue between the 2 of them (edited a bit coz it was quite long):
Crotch: Do you use your tougue when doing blowjob?
Phileine, recalling as she partially sticked her tougue out: I think so, what's up?
Crotch: We have to re-learn. Last night I was giving this guy a head. I thought he will enjoy it very much if I licked his diong diong crazy. But he shouted me to stop and ask me what the fuck I was doing? He said the the real art to blowjob is to make it feel like the dick is fucking a vagina, and does vagina has tougue? No!
Phileine: So how do we go about it?
Crotch: Open your mouth and say "ho...ly...", don't move your lips and tougue when saying.
Wahahaha, so ironic siah! They are teaching blowjob using the word "holy". Next time when I curse, I shall curse "Ho....ly.... ch88by8", yeah? wah hahahaha.
Anyway, the climax was Phileine found out that Max had to do real fucking scene with the main lead actress, Joanne, she went bersek and on the day of premier, she screwed the whole thing up. It was a big hoo-haa for it was part of the Shakespere's Festival. Max was angry with her but in the end, he decided to follow Phileine and gave up his acting. However, before he managed to find Phileine in the crazy mob of reporters, she had left with Joanne's husband. 他做初一,她就做十五lor.
Anyway, Max knew she went off with Joanne's husband and had fucked him, but he would only forgive her if she apologized. But she tek gong and Max, angered, left her stranded outside a pizza shop. He had prepared her a gift. Inside the box was a invitation to an AIDS relief party (another ironic part, the people at the party were fucking each other lor, and the theme was have protected sex, what phak!) Phileine went to find him. So the story ended with Phileine apologizing and Max forgave her lah!
When the showed ended, we were laughing and some scenes. Then I was joking to my friend, " I got a shocked when I saw we were sitting in between 3 ah nehs(so qiao lor), I was so scared they will start wanking. Luckily this show isn't harcore porno like those in Yang Tze, if not we have to wear poncho." My friend, having the same sense of humour as me, "I was having the same thoughts lor!" and we started laughing.
Then we also imitated the holy thing. Ke ke ke.
Come, repeat after me and say, "Ho...Ly..."

Friday, September 23, 2005

I just can't stop blogging!!!

Okie, I went back on my word again, but I dun care, I want to blog my thoughts on Survivor while it's still fresh out of my brain. I promise I will get my ass to study Physics later.
I think Blake is just lazing around, using his sickness as an excuse. Look at him during the Reward Challenge, he does not look sick to me. I hate suck phakernana guy, and Margaret the nurse is spoiling him.
During the reward challenge, it was such a close fight, I was hoping Yaxha will win, but they lost by just a horsenose (马鼻). Too bad lah, Rafe just couldn't get his ass out of the murky river, but they manage to pull the race close too. Anyway, nice fight! Oh yah, Gary proved one thing, "deng kar deng chiu (long hands long legs) makes you clumsy". Hmm.. sounds like someone I know.. eh.. Joking.
Lydia is just so sweet, how could they wanted to vote her out? She grind the corns and catch fishes. Yah yah, Morgan may be young, sweet and with a good sense a balance, but being lazy also means that if she and Lydia were to fight to the end, her laziness will bring her nothing. Lydia, being a mature woman, I'm sure she can fight as well as a 20 year old. A plus point for her, she can catch fish! Never mind that they didn't win the tools for catching fish, Lydia the Fishmonger can summon all the fishes at her bidding! Like The Pipe Piper who summon all the mouses. BTW, it was gross to see Rafe and Gary eating ants. I see liao also feel like vomiting like Blake.
The Immunity challenge, only one word: STUPID! What was Gary and Jamie thinking? And to think they resorted to use that tactic again, i.e. suddenly let loose of the rope (er.. it wasn't intentional is it?) Okie, watever, since he couldn't win, why did he (Jamie) wants to continue palying? Are there no other guys? He should have conserve his energy! He should attend my school's FE0001, teach him on energy conservation. I think they knew Rafe was weak, that's why they didn't let him play.
Anyway, I was glad that Yaxha didn't make the wrong choice voting Morgan out. In my opinion, it's unfair to vote a hardworking person out just because the lazy one was younger (=more strength). However, this also showed that the people in Yaxha is easily swayed. I can expect a good show coming...
Catch the story here. I will do a link on the side when I'm free.
BTW, Don't you all think Steph looks rather yummy with such a nice, gorgeous chocholate tan.Hmm, I LOVE chocolate! I think her boyfriend will agree with me that she is yummy. Ke ke ke.
I adore her very much. She's tough! Like Jamie said during Tribal Council, she's a girl who fights like a boy! Well, not surprising, she's the only girl out of her 5 siblings. Such gal is tough! Don't mess with her ar! I hope I can go to Survivor Finale to see her... Oh... Maybe I should do a coverage on Survivor 11: Guatemala, funny version.
That reminds me, I used visit a Survivor comic site which was damn funny. I see if I can find and I'll post it up. But I'm not too sure if the artist is still drawing. It has been a year since I last visted the website.
Okie, I will go and study my Physics now.

I can't help but believe it.

I was browsing My Yahoo page when I saw my today's horoscope:

Recently, I have an intense interest in blogging!!! I wonder who is that woman... so thrilled!

BTW, I lied. I said I will only update on Saturday, but I just couldn't keep my hands off the new laptop. =)

Anyway... Bless me I can do it for my Physics Quiz tomorrow. Don't think I will blog on Survivor tonight, maybe tmr? ^_^

Why do I always encounter stupid people?

So phakanana pissed. I'm very tired, so I shall make my blog short short.
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THE NEXT PHAKING SUPERWHITE WHO FIDGET IN LECTURE SEATS I'M GONNA CHOP THE LEGS UP, COOK IT WITH CURRY AND THEN FEED THEM TO THE HORNY AH PU NEI WORKERS WHO ALWAYS OGLE AT GIRLS, MAY DEATH UPON THEM!
Ok, I admit that I do shake my leg, but not at lectures. I only shake leg at home k. The 1st time I encounter shaking leg gal, I got so pissed off that I told her to stop shaking, I'm getting seasick. The 2nd time was the same gal, I stared at her and she stopped. Today, it was a gal from some other course, she not only shake and fidget, she also keep adjusting her seat and you know, like fall back onto the seat and the vibration will travel all the way to JB. I try to counter attack (The whole stretch only 2 of us sitting) but she don't seem to get the hint. So I remained motionless, since she's nerveless. And to think I have to be hoa lang and lend her my notes. Cursing her deep inside.
But like my friend said, at least you won't doze off during lecture since someone is shaking the chair to keep u awake.
Maybe this is why I'm so angry: I can't sleep with vibration mode on. (.\ _ /.)
I think the recent quizzes stressed me too much that I become very evil.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Blogging... (does not relate to my entry since I will digress very much later, so who cares?!?)

Warning: Disgusting entry, do not eat, especially chocolates while reading
Wah kaoz... The rain makes me so damn sleepy that I can't remember what I want to blog. Just now in the lecture was thinking, "Quickly end leh, I want to go back hostel to blog." But then after a bowl of nice yummy beefball kway tiao down my throat, I practically forgot what I wanted to say... But then as I write, I remember liao.
Just now I had my most excruciating moment. 让我从头细说。。。
I drink a cup of coffee every morning, except weekends lah since no lesson. In the past, it was a catalyst for my bowel movement, but in recent years it don't seem to work anymore, except occasionally. The past 2 days nothing happened when I downed the coffee. However, today, the alarm rang quite late, if not I will settle it before going for lectures. And so, today I had a 3 hrs lecture.
1st hr: Good, the caffeine worked and I didn't go fishing with Uncle Zhou.
2nd hr: Still wide awake...except the last 5 minutes coz the lecture was rather boring and I didn't have to write any side notes=no movement=sleepy.
1st 30 mins of 3rd hr: Stomach growling very loudly. Time to eat! Hmm.. thinking of eating the beefball noodle later at Canteen 2...
Next 15mins: An acute pain struck my breadbasket, and I could feel the air energy inside slowly building up the power... Wah lao eh....
Keep fidgeting, because of the coldness in the lecture theatre, hungriness and the urge to poot. Cannot concentrate what the lecturer was saying.
Can you imagine that? Cold+hungry+ the "urge", what a dreadful feeling. Suddenly, I wonder how the Eskimos do their "business" since they live in igloos?
Talking about poot, reminds me of a story.
本人的故事,纯属虚遘。 如有雷同,是我拿了一些 ideas 改编的。So don't come after me for copyright hor...
Long long time ago, there lived family of 5. Papa Bear, Mama Bear and their 3 daughters, and they were named Ah Kim (Gold), Ah Yin (Silver) and Pearl (the youngest had the most chic name). As you all can see from their names, Ah Kim and Ah Yin, were born in the Metal Age, thus their names. Pearl was born so much later than them, by then, it was a civilised period so must name her nice nice so that she will fit into the norms of the society later (i.e orh bit names were very difficult to remember while chic name like Pearl was easily inprinted into the people's memory). Anyway, I am relating this story about poot. So one fine day...
Ah Kim and Ah Yin were busy searching the bookshelf for... honey, to give for Pooh Bear's birthday.
Ah Yin: Alamak, I feel like poot poot.
Ah Kim: Go lah, if not later you shit here you will feed the flies, then the bees will be unhappy.
Ah Yin: Neber mind lah, I endure a while more and help you search. The feeling is not that urgent anyway.
Ah Kim: Ok, you mind looking below see the honey is there anot?
Ah Yin: Can can, I'll do it.
And so, Ah Yin squat down to search for honey. After 1 minute...
Ah Yin: Wah biangz!!! Tak boleh tahan liao lah, this squating is too tempting for my ass. Wo ai pang sai liao.
And Ah Yin happily go and make "chocolate cakes".
Morale of the story: Try squating when you have the ai pang sai buay sai pang (want to shit but cannot shit) feeling.
The End
Poor Bunny!
P/S: Physics Quiz on Saturday, so there will be no new entry till Saturday night. Maybe I will blog on Philene Says Sorry (The R21 movie, ^_^Y)

Ang Moh Eat Mooncakes

Just went to Hall 9's Mid-Autumn Festival mini Celebration. Nothing traditional about it, basically it's just singing and games. I think there was 猜登谜 and 欠扁问答题, but I didn't participate coz by the time I was there, almost finished. Was there listening to 2 very extreme singers. One was so bad that I feel like stuffing the mooncake in his ass mouth so that he will stop singing. The girl she sang very well. I ate 2 mooncakes (cut one lah, not the full mooncakes) and then left for my darts training. BTW, the way the ang moh eat the mooncakes so cute. I dunno why, maybe because we are so used to seeing black hair yellow skin eat mooncakes. This is the first time I see blonde hair blue eyes eating mooncake, quite a sight. Wonder what were they thinking when they eat the mooncakes? Were they thinking "Nice mooncakes?" or "Weird cakes weird names weird taste, but since it's free, whatever." Don't think they so cheapskate like some us lah hor.
Anyway, during the darts training, captain BP was telling me that, senior JH and darts IC Fortune Cat told him that my hands raise too high up when I aimed the higher numbers. Then I asked, "They find it funny and weird huh?" "Yah", replied BP.
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OHMYGOODNESSGRACIOUSME!
Why didn't they tell me in the face? Huh? Huh? I was so embarassed ok... Anyway, what's so funny with my hand raising up? Can see smoke coming out from my armpits is it? If it was really like that, then it is funny. Anyway, as a senior and captain, they didn't correct me. Really KNS. Fortune Cat just now even asked, "You aiming high numbers ar, raise your hand high high ar !" (he said something like that). Wah lau, feel like arrowing my darts at his butt (woah! it rhymes), solid enough. :P

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Rockson Rocks!

Wah sai, I was introduced to this chor lor blogger (he said he not beng, just chor) by my friend today, Rockson Takumi Tan, coz we were talking about blogging. He is sibe tok gong man... every sentence sure got KNNBCCB lah, F**k lah, L** Ch**w lah, I read until I sibe high. I want to continue reading but then, got this kuai lan quiz on Saturday, then today they said makeup tutorial also on Saturday, ch**by* lah, want to enjoy his blog also cannot. And then to study for this quiz, I must "闭关修练" for 3 days 3 nights. Wu yai bor, you must be thinking. Bo pian lah, wo ai pang sai kor pia mah.
(Jiat Lat lah, getting the Rockson fever after Xiaxue's fever. Scarly after 3 days of studying Physics, I will be spouting formula here, then you all see liao also high. Haha)

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Hostel Living

I wanna blog about my lecturers, but a conversation with my roomate lead me to write this.
So far, I have been staying in Hall 9 for 2 months and 2 days. How do I feel about it? It's GOOOOOOOOOD. Why? Lots of reason, example, I don't have to wake up at a crazy 5.30am, and travel 1.5 freaking hours to come to school. I don't have to squeeze the sardine-packed bus, be it coming to school or going back home. Although the free shuttle bus that takes us around NTU is packed like sardines too, but at least it's only for like at most 20 minutes and ta-da, you see your bed greeting you by the door. =) And also, in between breaks can come back and recharge, then go for lesson again.
Staying in hostel is a totally different lifestyle. You see, you don't see people in your HDB block 2 am 3 am still not asleep right? I'm consider an early sleeper, for I sleep at midnight, usually. Thank god I'm a heavy sleeper too, if not with the noises outside sometimes can be quite disturbing. Then The JCRC sometimes hold events like Block Supper, Movie Viewing, woah, totally fresh and fun!
You get to know a lot people too, and sometimes they happen to be your coursemates or in same tutorial group too. This is what prompted me to write this. My roomie and I, we wash our clothes in the laundry room. As for the 内在美,we handwash lah, and usually at night. Why? Coz at night less people roam around the block. Bringing our 内在美 to hang dry is always funny and a joke we always share. We always make sure NO GUYS is around, although sometimes they pop out of the scenes so suddenly. This is not the most frightening, coz can always act cool, then quickly get it done with and go back room. The most frightening is...
Based on true story but add a little pepper
It was a cooling afternoon, everyone was about to fall asleep because of the rainy weather.
Guy: Are you from hall 9?
Me, kanna woke up: Huh? Yah.. hall 9
Guy: From block 48, stay in level 2 right?
Me: Yah... (Did he stalk me?)
Guy: I also stay in block 48, level 4, just opposite you. I thought you look familiar when I see you around the block. Blah blah blah..
Me: Huh.. Really ar? Ok, no wonder... Blah Blah Blah (Fuckanana. Did he see me hanging my 内在美 anot? Siao liao lah...)
Haha. Anyway, the guys below us are poor things: always walking under a long stretch of hanging bras and panties.
Update: Both freaks did not contact me today. Yesh!

Monday, September 19, 2005

Freaking Tiring Day

Wah!!! I'm so tired! Been sleeping at 3am for the past 1 week, coz been studying diligently (eh... 50% only lah, most of the time also dunno do what), now my back is aching very badly. Like going back to the time when I was working at JYPS, shoulders ached very much. Then missed my kickboxing twice, never got the chance work out also.

Dropped dead on the bed when school ended today, din even eat dinner (sure slim down!). Wah sai... can really feel the stress coming liao... OHMYGOODNESS!
Went to bath when I woke up. Roomie was back in the room when I went back to the room. When she saw me, she gave me a very agitated look and said,"Siqi, dunno which pervert stole my xiao ku ku! Angry leh! Got feeling for it u noe, wear for 2 years liao! I curse him next life got no underwear to wear!" (Story edited a bit coz when 2 gals are together, we definitely bitch together about this freak but of coz, cannot tell u what we bitch mah, portray bad images then no one wants me how? LOL) Stupid undie-thieve, may he kanna ass rape.
Talking about freaks, I got to know 2 recently, both from friendster. Seems like I was featured under Friendster's gallery, and because my profile can be viewed by everyone. So these 2 freaks message me and wanna be frens lah. Frens oni mah, no harm right? But it was a big mistake... 1 freak wanna woo me, the other freak... haiz... a picture tells a thousand word. See:

Can see the message? See those red underline? He addressed me as dear and gave me a "muackz"! OH MY GOD! Yee.. what's wrong with him huh? I just sms chat with him for like less than 24 hours and he called me dear. And before I saw this message, he messaged me this morning and the conversation was like this:

Freak: Hi Dear, guess u must be in school now. Now raining at Tekong, very cold leh. Come and give me warmth leh. Hee Hee

Me(utterly disgusted by now): *SHOCK* Y u call me dear? did u message the wrong person?

Freak: Sorry, I thought I'm being nice to you by calling u "dear".

Me(Horrified): Huh? I thought only gf will be called dear one what. Anyway, I HATED this word.

He did not message back.

Good, if he message me tomorrow, I'll tell him to go and get some warmth from the faggots in his camp, think they would love to hug him. I think he looks cuddly to them hor. =)

I kanna scared silly by them. Any ideas how to deal with the 2nd one?

Sunday, September 18, 2005

Happy Mid-Autumn Festival!!!!








Ha ha! I like this one best coz it's about a cute little pig. It's really boffo coz my mobile phone's font was small and because it's in chinese, I can hardly made out the words. So both my upper and lower eyelids were pushing each other (i.e. squinting) to view the message. When I saw the last line I bursted out laughing. Ha Ha Ha. Today is the Chinese Festival, Zhong Qiu Jie, how can I miss it? So I sent 1 sms to everybody, and in return, they sent greetings back to me too. Some are really amusing, like this one:








and this one:








Very funny hor, hor! Since it's so time consuming to share these jokes and greetings through SMS, so I shall blog here and dedicate them to you all.

The 1st is for all my friends:







Next is for all those who cares:


For those with goldfish memory:


To all the Ai Swee Char Boh and Hiao Da Por:


To the Superstar/Tong Hua Fans (do sing along):
Last, to all the people with faith:








99

I saw my web counter reaching 99, I post this to remember it forever (unless Blogger no longer exists which I doubt will happen lah hor). It was only hitting 78 5 minutes ago. =)

Laziness... :P

Today is the last session of my kickboxing class, and I missed it. Bo pian lah, the weather was so nice this morning: no harsh sun rays attempting to burn my fats, nice big wind blow into my room. Such a nice Sunday weather for sleeping, I'm sure you all also won't get up even for the sake of 1 million dollars also lah! But then hor, it didn't last long for me also, my mum called me at 9am, wanting me to bring umbrella for her. When I finished brushing my teeth, she also came back home liao. -_-"' Wah Biang eh!!!
Talking about my kickboxing, I've been a faithful student and I enjoyed it immersely. I've joined since January this year, and never once did I miss a session. However, I made the wrong move when I shifted the Saturday session to Sunday session. Why so? Coz it's a*BROBDINGNAGIAN TORTURE to wake up at 8am on a Sunday morning!!!
I realised also, since there was a first time, there would be a second time and so on. The first time I missed my kickboxing was I was out the whole night, only to reach home at 5.30am in the wee hours. Slept at 6am. Of course, got fire I also won't wake up lah. The second time was just last week, I was online till 3am before I go and look for "Uncle Zhou" and played chess with him. I must have enjoyed the chess game very much that I couldn't wake up. Haha :P . And this morning was the third time, I even thought to myself, "Hiyah, last session already, don't go never mind one lah!" and proceed to cover myself with the nicely warmed pillow over my head. =)
Should I join the new class (Saturday's session of course lah, learnt my lesson liao) or should I wait till exams are over? No kakis no fun also leh... If anyone of you interested, sms me lah! =D The new class starts on 8th October, 11.30am - 12.30pm, at Yishun SFLC. =)





*BROBDINGNAGIAN : I found this word on dictionary.com and it looks cute, so I used it but not sure in the correct way or not. But who cares since we speak Singlish most of the time! Wah hahaha!

#UPDATE: Scene 2 later part happened to me when I was in the kitchen with my Papa. See, I expected it.

Huang Fei Hong

Was watching Huang Fei Hong movie just now... ah.. missed this type of action show so much. You know, the type where they use wires to fly here fly there. Then the heroes machiam made from metal like that, won't die one. In this episode, Huang Fei Hong was played by Zhao Wen Zhuo (What happen to him now anyway?) and got Big Eye Dude Mo Shao Cong also, which I think those born after 1990 won't really know him. Mo Shao Cong is so cute, his eyes automatically expanded and covered half of his face when he saw pretty girls, sibe tiko siah! Ha ha ha ha!
Anyway, there were these 2 bad guys, I shall call them Kiu Mo (Curly Hair, a quite well-known face part-time actor but dunno his name ) and Chang Mao (Long Hair, played by Qian Xiao Hao or Qian Jia Le, dunno which one lah). This Kiu Mo, very funny, keep hitting the horses across their long faces, to show that his fists were very powerful. As we all know in Chinese movies, bad guys had no good endings. So this Kiu Mo, he got his retribution when the horse used its powerful hoof and stomp on his arm (Ouchy!). Kiu Mo got angry and shouted, "I will kill you!!!" I think he was shouting to Gui Jiao Qi, since they were actually having a fight. Anyway, back to the horse, after he shouted wanting to kill, the horse machiam like "Nabeh, u scold me is it? Wa ai hor ler si (I want you to die)!" and use the other hoof and crushed Kiu Mo's arm. Wah Sai. I think the horse is revenging for all the other horses who acted in the movie. Poor horses, many of them were arrowed lah, kick lah, shoot lah. I can't help but halfway watching the show, a scene where another ke lian de horse was kanna hit, I added some lines for the horse, "Wa si beh(I am a horse), um si nabeh(not some vulgar words) lah!"
There was this other scene, where this general, was being shoot and was about to die. Huang rushed over and held him. As we all know, a dying person has some last words. So this general was summoning all his remaning energy to speak, "Ta ma de, what took you so long to come? " Nah... of course, that was not the line he said, he asked Huang to revenge for him lah, but I added the line before he said that and my sis, Jia was super turned off. But then, she also joined in the fun and said, "Wah biang, my scenes finally ended. Fly here fly there sibe tiring!" Wah hahaha, too bad I don't have the images lah, if not I think the effect will be better.

Saturday, September 17, 2005

GAWD!

I dreamt that I found my lost pouch... :(
And Dreams are always opposite of reality.
No wonder I cant't get a BF coz I'm always dreaming about hunks. WAH HAHAHAHAHA. (Just a silly joke to cheer myself up actually... haiz...)

Friday, September 16, 2005

The guys in Nakum are so lousy

Just finished watching Survivor 11-Guatemala. The guys in Nakum sucks! One by one went down, first was Blake, who got "screwed" by this tree with spikes. Poor thing. When they finally reached the camp, the guys except Brandon were so dehydrated, and vomited. 4 big burly guys leh.. aiyoh... see them vomit I also feel like vomiting. The iron ladies looked healthy after 11mile jungle trail! The nurse practitioner, Margaret, came in handy. She was responsible for nursing these big babies. So I think she is safe for the time being. Bo doctor wu nurse ma si ho (no doctor got nurse also can)!!!
It was really nice to see Bobby Jon and Stephanie back in this season. I love Steph! Aww... Poor Bobby Jon, suffering from very bad leg cramps that I think he almost passed out. Tsk tsk tsk. Today's just the 1st episode, no climax. The weak and the old was voted off- Jim the old fire captain. He hurt himself during the reward challenge and being the oldest in the tribe, it was no surprise he was voted off. (Those young chicks of coz would prefer to see the bodies of young hunky men and not a shrivelled old man right? hiak hiak hiak, just a joke).
Catch the story here if u missed it.
Tomorrow going home, think how to break the news (lost the matric cards, ez-link and most important: housekeys) to my family. "The Perils of Losing Things", written and directed by, er hem, ME!
Scene 1:
Sister Jia and Mum having nap. The hyperactive Sister Min was playing on her own in the balcony. I reached the doorstep, pressed the doorbell. Sister Min run to the door and shouted "Da Jie! Ni Hui Lai Lah!"
Me: "Min Min, go and get the key and open the door."
Min: "Why?"
Me: "I lost my keys, quick, my bags are heavy."
Min: "Why you lost your keys?"
Me: "Careless lor..."
Min: "Why u careless?"
Me: "Blur mah, didn't know I lost it."
Min: "Why u blur?"
Me: "Coz I am blur lah..." (a bit fed up)
Min: "Why are u blur?"
Me: "I'm born like that lor!" (steam coming out)
Min: "Why u born like that?"
Me: "Dunno! U ask mummy lah. Quick! Get the keys!"
Min: "Why ask Mummy?"
Me: "KEEP YOUR BLOODY MOUTH SHUT AND GO AND GET THE KEYS!!!" (fuming)
Min started to sob and run to her bed and wailed, leaving me at the door.
Scene 2:
Jia woken up by Min'a wailing, dragged herself to the door, asked me what happened. Halfway relating the story, she exclaimed, "WHAT! You lost your keys again?"
Opening the door for me, I saw my angry father in the kitchen who overheard what Jia said, especially the part "lost your key AGAIN".
Dad: "How you lost your keys?"
Me: "I was taking my tissue out and...."
Dad: "U put ur keys together with tissue! You shouldn't do that! You should put it inside your pockets mah! Keys very important, how can you put in together with tissues? You mus have throw it unknowingly. Your keys should always put inside your pocket. Like that you will know whether it's with you mah! Why you never keep track of your things, so careless of you! ............" (endless nagging from my dad who hardly speaks but once started it's never ending!)
Scene 3:
Me: "Mum, can help me duplicate one set of keys?"
Mum: "Hiyoh, you lost ur keys again, so careless! How many bunches had I dupilcated for you? Why are you so careless?"
Me: "Didn't realise the pouch wasn't with me when I left the theatre."
Mum: "What theatre? I thought you said you want to study in school? What are you doing at the theatre?"
Me: "Oh, PZ invited me to a movie preview mah, and it costs $5 only. "
Mum: "See? Serve you right, said want to study never study, if you had study in school you will not have lost your things."
Me: :"/
Scene 4:
Jia: "Wah Lau, why you always lost your keys de?"
Me: "You think I wanted meh? I lost my things, got to make a lot of reports, you think I enjoy meh?"
Jia: "You ar, so careless. Everytime in a new school surely must lose something then kam wan is it? Now dad is going to change the lock for the Nth time, see, u so troublesome! Worse, he might make triple locks! Wah Biang eh, then everyytime we will take 15 minutes to open the locks! See lah!"
Me: "..."
See? If I lost something, I will be bombarded. Anyway, the above is fake, I made it up one. Although a similar dialogue might come out from my dad. Hiak Hiak Hiak!
At the same time I was blogging, my sister MSNed me and she knew I lost my keys from my blog. She wasn't quite surprised though and said she will tell Dad on my behalf. So touched! So I said I will summon my endurance to prepare for my Dad's nagging. -_-"'

I got my laptop!!!!!

This is going to be a very boring entry on how I spent my day:

  • Last night mugged till 3am, woke up at 11am (was awake by 8.30am, but lazy bones lah). Mourned for my lost pouch... haiz... but decided nothing else could be done except to wait. Called my school's library and informed them my lost of matric card, (SOP), and the officer blocked my account and advised me to go SAO to do replacement. Forgot to ask him when will he unblock my account, what if I continue to wait and never make a replacement how?

  • Called TransLink to report the lost of the EZ-link card. The lady was so nice, told me to report to the National Library in case someone misuse my EZ-link card to borrow books. I would not have done that if she did not tell me. And thumbs up for Translink, I'm able to get back the remaining value in the card.

  • After fiddling with my notes for 5 minutes, decided I can't concentrate to mug also, so I made my way down to SAO office to file a report. I walked from my hostel to SAO, coz time to shed some fats lah... missed my kickboxing last week and I find myself suddenly bloated. LOL. Another nice soul, the uncle told me to file a report first and then go to level 1 to make replacement (eh, how come the librarian asked me to do replacement at level 6).

  • Move my fat ass down to level 1, told the lady I want to do replacement. Advised me not to in case some kind soul will return my pouch (2 days liao leh). Told her my situation about the laptop, she said she can print a letter to authorise that I'm a student of NTU. I'm so grateful!!!

  • Rush my ass to 8 flags, did the necessary admin work, and voila! I got my laptop, and with all the freebies! Dislike the backpack to the core, stated in the purchase order form was BLUE for my bag, but they gave me BROWN. Yucks! But I think I got more than I had bargained for. Free thumbdrive, cable lock, USB hub, a small pouch. Whoopie!

  • Spend the rest of the day meddling wif the new laptop. Wahahahaha!

Yesterday went back to Cineleisure, still, nothing was found, but the lady was so nice to let me go in and check for myself, but it has already been a day, so chances very slim also. Then I went to report to the Cine management, but judging from the way the security guard fumbled for "lost item" form, I think chances of getting back is not high. Bleahz...

ALERT! For those ginger haters like me, please do not eat Myojo's instant chicken porridge, coz their product is so good that they had dried gingers in the package. Strongly Recommend the Seafood and Duck Porridge. It's good! Yummy!

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Why am I so CARELESS???!!!!!???

Boo hoo hoo, I am so sad, I lost my tissue pouch yesterday. Not only does it contain a pack of tissue, there are my matriculation card, student EZ-link card, my house keys, and my favorite keychain which is no longer available now… SO SAD!!!!
Please pray hard for me that the personnel in-charge in Cathay Cineleisure will call me and bring me good news. *cross my fingers*

Now with my matriculation card missing, I can’t collect my laptop, Zhen Shi TA MA DE!!!!! I waited for so long liao…Grr…. Now I really have to concentrate on mugging…4 quizzes coming up when school starts, what a week!

Whatever, I am going to make a trip down to Cine later and double confirm.

Anyway, the movies I've watched were good, "Phileine Says Sorry" and "Be With Me". I will do a movie review once I finished my "battle".

Monday, September 12, 2005

About my name

Since this is the 1st post, I shall talk about myself, about my name.

I love my name very much since young, although it's quite common, but not over-use until like I can have a dozen of Huilin/Huiling/Huili in my phonebook like that. And also, together with my surname, it makes a perfect combo of 0-4-7 (ling-si-qi, sound like my name, lin si qi). So very cute right?

However, when I had my first email account, I wanted something special, something cuter. So I thought of both my Chinese and Western Zodiacs, which are the Pig (Boar) and Aquarius. So together, it makes Aquapig, a water pig. HAHAHAHA

Sure, it was cute and funny. My cousin, who was working at that time, uses her company mail to forward email to her friends and relatives. So during one CNY, she told me all her colleagues asked her, “Eh, tat aquapig email address very funny, the pig can swim is it? Who’s that friend of yours?” I treated it as a “compliment”, coz I thought “Hee hee, my email address very special”.

Anyway, now years down the road, I have started to use my initials, LSQ and 047, in any permutations, as my login account name and other things like initials in some records. Recently, while I was having darts training, I was aiming for the number 17. My captain came over, saw that I was aiming 17, and cracked a very lame joke, “Hmm… Siqi aim Shi Qi”, meaning, Si qi aiming at 17, which sounds similar too. My other teammates joined in the fun and laughed about it. I act cool and said, “Not funny lor, so lame”, although I was trying very hard to control my laughter. Then, while we were having friendly match, my senior asked for my initials, and so I replied, “S Q”. He joked that I’m the airline is it. So I joked back and said, “U din know SQ047 belongs to me meh?” Puzzled by what I said, I continue, “Lin Si Qi, 0-4-7 mah!” Immediately, he and my captain had 3 strokes of sweats -_-/// coming down from their forehead. Brrr… freezing lame sia…

This morning, while I was trying to think of a creative name for my blog, without much brainstorming, I decided on SQ047, but somehow it was taken, so I added a “flight” in front. So now, u people are now “on board” on Boeing SQ047. LOL… sorry, I digressed a little. Anyway, while I was bathing, I recalled all the hilarious incidents about my names, like when I ordered pizza and they wanted my name, I gave them SQ. when they shouted for me to collect my pizza, the lady boss, giving a serious look and said, “SQ? 007 mah?” and then she broke out laughing to herself. I want to tell her, “No it’s 047!”LOL. Another one was my IT illiterate non-IT savvy sister, Jia. One evening, when I came back home from NYP, she excitedly run to me and said, “HEY, your name was reported in the news!” She was lamer than I, but at that point, she sounded so serious and so I thought, did I join in any events and they had actually reported on it? Anyway, Jia said the news will be reported after the commercial break. So I waited, without changing my clothes first, fear that I would miss the news. When I saw the damn heading, I immediately turned off. Why? Coz the goddamn news was on some SQL technology and my sister thought it was funny that my initial is the same. (Si Qi Lin, if written in ang moh’s way)

Anyway, as I recalled, I had this silly idea, what if I combine my name and zodiacs together. Come, let u all guess the end results first. Come guess lah…. Not necessarily must be flightSQ047 and aquapig, but more like things connected them link together. Let me tell u, the end result is superb! Ready? It is…
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Aqua-Aero-Pig! (Aqua Aerobics)
Kua… Kua… Kua…