Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Monday, July 28, 2008
bUSEE bUSEE
I was quite overwhelmed last week, but thinking back, it did not seem so leh....
Mon: Slack （Did I really slack?）
Tues: Submit report, get convo tix and the cert etc, whole day gone
Wed: CONVOCATION! Waiting for all the pretty pics!
Thurs: Interview at STK, half the day gone
Fri: At Godma's house for work, then went to make myself pretty (my nails actually) for the D&D. Damn the tix number 0044 who won the Casio Exilim Camera. Hmpf! 我要那个相机啦！我会永远记得你！讨厌啦！
But then, 那晚俺倒是几爽几shiok一下, 原因来自。。。请看以下照片吧!
My HRM Team... One guy not here. Neh mind, Mr. Hobbes was. :P
Eh... 不要讲得太白， 心知肚明旧就好，ok?
Still waiting for more pics from Wed and Fri that night: Miss Ng, Miss Gwee, got it? Heh!
Mon: Slack （Did I really slack?）
Tues: Submit report, get convo tix and the cert etc, whole day gone
Wed: CONVOCATION! Waiting for all the pretty pics!
Thurs: Interview at STK, half the day gone
Fri: At Godma's house for work, then went to make myself pretty (my nails actually) for the D&D. Damn the tix number 0044 who won the Casio Exilim Camera. Hmpf! 我要那个相机啦！我会永远记得你！讨厌啦！
But then, 那晚俺倒是几爽几shiok一下, 原因来自。。。请看以下照片吧!
My HRM Team... One guy not here. Neh mind, Mr. Hobbes was. :PEh... 不要讲得太白， 心知肚明旧就好，ok?
Still waiting for more pics from Wed and Fri that night: Miss Ng, Miss Gwee, got it? Heh!
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Terrible interview...Terrible week...
I went to an interview this morning to realize I'm not going to the one I want! From a normal Engineer, suddenly become System Safety Engineer... and from the job scope the SE told me, one little mistake and it could be hazardous! Like vehicle blown up and kill people! Wah lau....
My convocation... Very happening, but I think my parents left a bit too early, only took one photo shoot. I wanted to bring them to try the food, but ended up like they didn't do anything and then they left. Mum's shoes broke on the way, Dad was in the toilet when I was on stage, food sucks, camera spoilt. Everything so wrong!
Jamie also broke her front tooth after being knocked down by her clumsy friend. A big chip somemore! Her teeth wasn't very strong in the first place already.... Haiz...
More job hunt!
Monday, July 21, 2008
Mahjong Madness
Wah ha ha ha! I won a total of $24++ on Saturday night! Damn shiok! It was such an adrenalin rush game that I jumped in joy when I won a game with "花上" coz the tile was the last already! Heng to the max lor! Jia gave me a cold by reminding me not to break the floor.
Sunday we played mahjong again, although I didn't win, it was a small lost, $2.40, about 10% of my winnings. Ha.... Sub Sub Suey lah! :P
Went to buy 汤圆 from the neighbourhood mart on Thursday, and the fridge was horribly smelly! I told the auntie about it and Mum seemed to be amused that I told the auntie about her smelly fridge. What's wrong? Smelly mah, should tell so that she could rectify the problem right? I was pretty worried that 汤圆 would be smelly too.
It's convocation this week, and I am still jobless. Haiz...
P/S: Kenny Sia Blog Plug linked to this A-List Anonymous Celebrity. After I read, she revelaled about partying her birthday until 5am this morning, and from what I analysed from her blog, she seemed to be a party siao girl. So I had a rough idea of who she is and checked on IMDB on this really young superstar's birthday and I got it right! Pretty much obvious who she is actually. Check here
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Clean clean clean
Every Wednesday, I will bring Jamie to school and then I return to my bed once I returned. Depends on the situation, sometimes I will use the computer for an hour or two before I go back to my dreamland.
Not this morning. For the n+1 time, I was cleaning my room again. You may wonder, or screaming inside yourself, "Your room is so bloody clean already, still clean?" Bo pian... My dressing table was infested with ants because of an unseen dead insect which was beyond recognition. So I clean lor... and while I clean, I decide to do some packing also and that leaded me to entering numerous times in Jia's room to get some stuffs which she complained to me I was very disruptive to her sleep.
After a nap + lunch break, I went to clean the art section (a small area which we dedicated to art & craft stuffs like drawing paper, construction paper, paintbrushes tc) because I was looking for something. Then after being a temp handyman fixing the skin of the study table (table old liao, waspeeling), I wiped the surface on the way.
Jia was very very very disturbed by my obsessive cleaning the whole day, even though it took me out of my couch potato state (with pc). Well, when the mood starts, is hard to stop for me. She was most annoyed when I was doing worksheet filing for Jamie (yes, I'm becoming a slave to her liao), not because Jamie didn't do it herself, but because I was not helping Jia with any of her things. :P
Yes, look a little bias but then... she hasn't had much stuffs to clear anyway.
I am really obsessed with cleaning, after watching TV shows, I would start to vacuum at 9pm and it took me 45 minutes. Then I would mop the floor for 15 minutes and then watched the 10pm show and then try to mop the floor at every commercial interval. Usually I mop the kitchen last when the shows end. It would be 11.30pm before I bath. Despite doing all these at such late timings, I rather enjoyed the clean clean house after my hard work. I think, somehow, this is a subconcious effort to compensate my presence at home.
Make myself useful mah!
Not this morning. For the n+1 time, I was cleaning my room again. You may wonder, or screaming inside yourself, "Your room is so bloody clean already, still clean?" Bo pian... My dressing table was infested with ants because of an unseen dead insect which was beyond recognition. So I clean lor... and while I clean, I decide to do some packing also and that leaded me to entering numerous times in Jia's room to get some stuffs which she complained to me I was very disruptive to her sleep.
After a nap + lunch break, I went to clean the art section (a small area which we dedicated to art & craft stuffs like drawing paper, construction paper, paintbrushes tc) because I was looking for something. Then after being a temp handyman fixing the skin of the study table (table old liao, waspeeling), I wiped the surface on the way.
Jia was very very very disturbed by my obsessive cleaning the whole day, even though it took me out of my couch potato state (with pc). Well, when the mood starts, is hard to stop for me. She was most annoyed when I was doing worksheet filing for Jamie (yes, I'm becoming a slave to her liao), not because Jamie didn't do it herself, but because I was not helping Jia with any of her things. :P
Yes, look a little bias but then... she hasn't had much stuffs to clear anyway.
I am really obsessed with cleaning, after watching TV shows, I would start to vacuum at 9pm and it took me 45 minutes. Then I would mop the floor for 15 minutes and then watched the 10pm show and then try to mop the floor at every commercial interval. Usually I mop the kitchen last when the shows end. It would be 11.30pm before I bath. Despite doing all these at such late timings, I rather enjoyed the clean clean house after my hard work. I think, somehow, this is a subconcious effort to compensate my presence at home.
Make myself useful mah!
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Wa Kaoz
Jamie developed sexy raspy voice after a greedy attempt of hot fudge sundae + sweets, words out from her mouth were hardly audible.
As usual, her maths was not up to my standard and I was telling her to draw the graph higher to achieve the desired 26-bouquets marking on the graph, coz it was not tall enough. She gave me a "Wa Kao".
"How dare you Wa Kao at me?"
Clearing her throat, she croaked, "Not Wa Kao, is hen gao! （很高）"
Oh, sorry, my mistake. She was trying to tell me the graph was very "tall".
Jiat Lat, my life revolve around only Jamie.
As usual, her maths was not up to my standard and I was telling her to draw the graph higher to achieve the desired 26-bouquets marking on the graph, coz it was not tall enough. She gave me a "Wa Kao".
"How dare you Wa Kao at me?"
Clearing her throat, she croaked, "Not Wa Kao, is hen gao! （很高）"
Oh, sorry, my mistake. She was trying to tell me the graph was very "tall".
Jiat Lat, my life revolve around only Jamie.
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
The League of Extraordinary Spectacle Girls
As much as we nagged nagged nagged about do not read in dim light, do not sit near the TV, do not lie down and read books, Jamie finally joined us in this league with a degree power of 1.75 each.
都跟你讲不要读 harry potter 了！
I realized I commanded much authority over her, one word from me and she will go scrambling to do whatever I told her to. Despite so much nagging and scoldings, she still has full of love for me instead of hate, ha ha.
I think we 3 sisters shared a miraculous relationship. Jia pissed me, I pissed Jamie, Jamie pissed Jia, but on second thought, Jamie and I pretty much hold hands together and pissed Jia most of the time. Nevertheless, we three are bonded, in any kind way.
Jamie is very blur, more blur than me. Her subtraction problem ended as addition, so I was telling her that logically, no subtraction problem will have an answer bigger than the number given in the problem.
“那里有东西越减号码越大的？” I said.
Jia quipped in， “你咯！”
Win liao lor... I know my diet attempts just pack in the pounds instead of taking away.
都跟你讲不要读 harry potter 了！
I realized I commanded much authority over her, one word from me and she will go scrambling to do whatever I told her to. Despite so much nagging and scoldings, she still has full of love for me instead of hate, ha ha.
I think we 3 sisters shared a miraculous relationship. Jia pissed me, I pissed Jamie, Jamie pissed Jia, but on second thought, Jamie and I pretty much hold hands together and pissed Jia most of the time. Nevertheless, we three are bonded, in any kind way.
Jamie is very blur, more blur than me. Her subtraction problem ended as addition, so I was telling her that logically, no subtraction problem will have an answer bigger than the number given in the problem.
“那里有东西越减号码越大的？” I said.
Jia quipped in， “你咯！”
Win liao lor... I know my diet attempts just pack in the pounds instead of taking away.
Monday, July 14, 2008
Auntie Magnet
I think my face attract aunties, cute, lovable and harmless. But they shunned away the moment I talk. Ha ha...
One auntie requested my help to buy 4D today, nothing weird happened, and I won $5 in the scratch card. I had bought the card so that I would have change to return the auntie, unexpectally bring me a tiny windfall!
Hopefully luck keeps on rolling!
Saturday, July 12, 2008
Sianz sianz sianz
Another week gone again... Now I'm having a very entertaining time doing housework, and I packed my room (again!) for the nth time since May... A lot compared to previously twice a year cleaning.
Seriously, I don't think I'll get a call from the manager. Instead of a impressive interview, I gave him a memorable one, a "Thank you you" followed by a muffled "Thansss for your time.too" at the end of the interview. And when I asked what was my chance of getting hired, he turned a big round telling me he still had to compare with other candidates, and told me usually resume would be kept a year before they throw. I took it as a hint lor.
Haiz...
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Why? Why? Why?
Why I so stupid???
There were so many things I could do to impress the interviewer but I didn't!
I wanted to email the admin secretary for the name of the interviwer, I did not.
I wanted to say hi and shake his hand but I did not.
I wanted to research on their products but I did not.
I couldn't even say a thank you properly!
I couldn't answer properly to his questions but I bombarded him with a lot of questions. More like I interview him lor... I was very intrigued by the job scope and I truly wanted this job, now I screwed it up badly. Don't think I'll get pass to the 2nd round of interview. Damn...
Project payment kenna delay... eat grass liao lor
Project payment kenna delay... eat grass liao lor
Sunday, July 06, 2008
贤妻良母
Freak! I had this really weird dream about getting a real lousy job and saw Mr. Hobbes getting hitched! Nightmarish!
I met a hostel friend last Friday and hence, we went for an impromptu chat-n-drink session at Mos Burger. The topics ranged from job hunt to life recently. Since I am unemployed, my only entertainment was to follow my mum on her job. So, this lead to how neat and tidy I always kept my hostel room that many friends feared my visit to their rooms, coz they scared I "not used" and had to sweep before my grand entrance, ha ha. (Side track, I just cleared Jamie's study table today coz the mess was beyond description and I could not tolerate it!) The friend exclaimed, "哇！你可以做贤妻良母了！"
This is the nth such compliment I heard with regards to my exceptional cleaning habit. To top it off, I had training in caring for baby too 9 years ago. So it does makes me a perfect housewife, yah? But then, being a wife now doesn't have to clean like a pro, coz there's always the house maid to save the day what. So I think, I make the perfect maid! Anybody wish to request my service?
Just like things we buy, some people go for look, some people go for the functions, and we usually don't have the best of both worlds. So I'm pretty much like the machine with very good functions but with terrible design, so the buyer really has to know me inside out to get the best out of me, and I pretty much expected nothing more than a dust cover (keep on the shelf too long).
Mama Delfino (Mike's mother in Desperate Housewives) said: A woman should be a chef in the kitchen, a maid in the living room and a whore in the bedroom. We women are really being exploited physically, mentally and emotionally leh! The roles we have to fufill... how come guys just need to be the man in the house and need not do anything?
I met a hostel friend last Friday and hence, we went for an impromptu chat-n-drink session at Mos Burger. The topics ranged from job hunt to life recently. Since I am unemployed, my only entertainment was to follow my mum on her job. So, this lead to how neat and tidy I always kept my hostel room that many friends feared my visit to their rooms, coz they scared I "not used" and had to sweep before my grand entrance, ha ha. (Side track, I just cleared Jamie's study table today coz the mess was beyond description and I could not tolerate it!) The friend exclaimed, "哇！你可以做贤妻良母了！"
This is the nth such compliment I heard with regards to my exceptional cleaning habit. To top it off, I had training in caring for baby too 9 years ago. So it does makes me a perfect housewife, yah? But then, being a wife now doesn't have to clean like a pro, coz there's always the house maid to save the day what. So I think, I make the perfect maid! Anybody wish to request my service?
Just like things we buy, some people go for look, some people go for the functions, and we usually don't have the best of both worlds. So I'm pretty much like the machine with very good functions but with terrible design, so the buyer really has to know me inside out to get the best out of me, and I pretty much expected nothing more than a dust cover (keep on the shelf too long).
Mama Delfino (Mike's mother in Desperate Housewives) said: A woman should be a chef in the kitchen, a maid in the living room and a whore in the bedroom. We women are really being exploited physically, mentally and emotionally leh! The roles we have to fufill... how come guys just need to be the man in the house and need not do anything?
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
Almost won $500
Last week, on the day of the spit incident, I was to buy 4D numbers for my mum. Since kenna "head prize", I thought more or less some luck is following me. And miraculously, the number 2708 became 2702 on the chit, wah, I thought maybe this is the magic number leh! But alas, it wasn't!
Today 2702 was on the starter prize, -_-||| Should have bought continuously! Especially so after meeting the crackpot!
Had another of those "I am freaking fat" day. But the medicine for my ear infection made me so drowsy, plus I did not drink my coffee today. Hence, I slept almost half the day away, aeroplane Belle's invite for a jog.
Cannot! Cannot! Must start some routine somehow...
Today 2702 was on the starter prize, -_-||| Should have bought continuously! Especially so after meeting the crackpot!
Had another of those "I am freaking fat" day. But the medicine for my ear infection made me so drowsy, plus I did not drink my coffee today. Hence, I slept almost half the day away, aeroplane Belle's invite for a jog.
Cannot! Cannot! Must start some routine somehow...
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
Just when I thought nothing weirder could happen to me after the spit...
I met an old crackpot!
I went to Watson's after a doctor's visit, and was on my way home when a lady, dunno whether she was middle-age or near 70s coz the makeup on her face looked like she had used flour instead of normal foundation, approached me to help her carry some stuffs. She said she had really important documents and cannot "拿上拿下". She was carrying 3 bags, a small tote, a medium fluffy dog-design handbag, and a large light blue but very dirty bottom shoulder bag on her left arm, a letter in her hand, and pieces of $50 notes and bankbook in her right hand. Oh, I haven't mentioned her hairstyle, she had bangs, those flat and thick kind which cover her brows, long hair crimped on the back with a clip but wasn't any tidier.
Anyway, I thought it was to carry stuffs to her car, coz she came out from the carpark, so I obliged. She called NTUC as Government Minimart （政府合作社）and we were there, I realised I was to do her shopping! Never mind... Since I had gave her my words, I thought I just quickly settled it and go. I asked her why not put her money and letter into her bag, she said, "Oh, they are very important, I cannot put them inside!" What the....
As the minute passed, I got more uncomfortable. I myself had a big Watson bag with my stuffs, and I had to helped her with her things somemore. She didn't have an agenda, very spontaneously listed out her items, as below:
So I told her I would go and change the oranges, and when I saw that she wasn't looking, I made my escape!
It was very embarrassing when I was with her, she kept talking to everybody how nice I was, yet she was very demanding! When I left the basket behind, she actually asked me to push the basket with my foot! Why not she push with her foot and grab the items with her elbows! For a while I felt bad, but then thinking of the attention we were getting in NTUC, I think I should not have agreed to help her in the first place!
Wah biang!
It took me 15 years to know the correct way of washing my ears. Just rub with a wet cloth will do. I disliked the oiliness and had always used soap and water to shower. Dang! My right ear has infection and I had always thought it was a huge pimple in my ear! Now I really afraid that I will go deaf, which is a high possibility coz I huh a lot of times nowadays, and people had to repeat to me 5 times before I get their words. Terrible!!!
Not as bad as Jamie's, I asked her to help me blow (吹) away the dirt in my infected ear, she gave me a light hit(捶) on my ear! Not surprise if I really become deaf!
I finally got a job reply!!! Mum as usual, said "Go and try lah!" A weird answer to someone who is desperately wanting to go interviews!
I went to Watson's after a doctor's visit, and was on my way home when a lady, dunno whether she was middle-age or near 70s coz the makeup on her face looked like she had used flour instead of normal foundation, approached me to help her carry some stuffs. She said she had really important documents and cannot "拿上拿下". She was carrying 3 bags, a small tote, a medium fluffy dog-design handbag, and a large light blue but very dirty bottom shoulder bag on her left arm, a letter in her hand, and pieces of $50 notes and bankbook in her right hand. Oh, I haven't mentioned her hairstyle, she had bangs, those flat and thick kind which cover her brows, long hair crimped on the back with a clip but wasn't any tidier.
Anyway, I thought it was to carry stuffs to her car, coz she came out from the carpark, so I obliged. She called NTUC as Government Minimart （政府合作社）and we were there, I realised I was to do her shopping! Never mind... Since I had gave her my words, I thought I just quickly settled it and go. I asked her why not put her money and letter into her bag, she said, "Oh, they are very important, I cannot put them inside!" What the....
As the minute passed, I got more uncomfortable. I myself had a big Watson bag with my stuffs, and I had to helped her with her things somemore. She didn't have an agenda, very spontaneously listed out her items, as below:
- Johnson & Johnson Baby Powder Twin packs (Large)
- Load washing powder medium
- Toilet paper
- Facial Cotton
- Magnolia Milk Twin Pack
So I told her I would go and change the oranges, and when I saw that she wasn't looking, I made my escape!
It was very embarrassing when I was with her, she kept talking to everybody how nice I was, yet she was very demanding! When I left the basket behind, she actually asked me to push the basket with my foot! Why not she push with her foot and grab the items with her elbows! For a while I felt bad, but then thinking of the attention we were getting in NTUC, I think I should not have agreed to help her in the first place!
Wah biang!
It took me 15 years to know the correct way of washing my ears. Just rub with a wet cloth will do. I disliked the oiliness and had always used soap and water to shower. Dang! My right ear has infection and I had always thought it was a huge pimple in my ear! Now I really afraid that I will go deaf, which is a high possibility coz I huh a lot of times nowadays, and people had to repeat to me 5 times before I get their words. Terrible!!!
Not as bad as Jamie's, I asked her to help me blow (吹) away the dirt in my infected ear, she gave me a light hit(捶) on my ear! Not surprise if I really become deaf!
I finally got a job reply!!! Mum as usual, said "Go and try lah!" A weird answer to someone who is desperately wanting to go interviews!
Thursday, June 26, 2008
水瓶座终极完美分析
I think this person really did a thorough research, and a witty one too. Here.
几乎每个水瓶座的心底都有着一段刻骨铭心人间记忆，一个永远无法忘记的背影。
那也许只是极其短暂的两情相悦，只是一种单恋，或只是一种只存在于虚幻空间。
一切看起来是那么平静，那么和谐。
没有惊天动地，没有海誓山盟，没有花前月下，没有浪漫，没有誓言，没有温度。水瓶座的理智和冷漠，注定了任何感情永无燃点。
水瓶座不容易喜欢上一个人。有人说水瓶座对伴侣的要求太高，其实并非这样，水瓶座注重的是感觉。只是那么轻描淡写的一眼，那个人已经吸引了水瓶的所有注意力，从此目光便无法转移。
用一秒钟爱上一个人，然后再付出一生去忘记，水瓶座就是这样的试验品。
但几乎所有的水瓶都会否认在自己的身上发生一见钟情，因为一向自视清高，承认爱上一个人这钟事似乎是在侮辱自己的智商。
更多的时候是因为，连自己都没发现已经爱上。水瓶座很多时候对于感情反应非常迟钝，迟钝到每次都是最后的知情者。有时容易出现弄不清自己的感觉，不清楚自己想做什么，觉得迷惘。
在对方没有非常明确地表示感情时会退怯，觉得爱情是两厢情愿，不想勉强对方。
显得很被动，忽冷忽热，犹豫不决，极其矛盾。在没有完全确定前，决不轻易付出感情，因为怕失去。也许是缺乏安全感，也许是对自己的保护，也可以算作是一种自私。
一般水瓶座的好朋友都是经过很长世间的考察的，不仅仅是几年，而是十几年。一旦被水瓶座当作好朋友的，会赴汤蹈火掏心掏肺。
在公车上，街边，商场，水瓶老是认错人。在茫茫人海中，始终在寻找一个熟悉的身影，直到产生幻觉。
这一刻，水瓶座突然很想痛哭流涕，因为突然发现自己几近疯狂的爱上一个人，失去了理智，失去了自我。这种突如其来的感觉，很恐惧，很无助。
水瓶座不喜欢这种感觉，因为不知该如何面对。要让水瓶座主动去追逐，是件异常困难的事，在水瓶座的世界里无法承受拒绝，就是这么脆弱，无论表面上看来是多么的坚强。
水瓶座在人前总是一幅无忧无虑没心没肝的样子，不想别人看见自己的悲伤，那样会有不安全的感觉，总是在无人的地方暗自落泪。
算了，还是放在心里吧。既不用尴尬的表白然后遭到拒绝，又不会相爱容易相处难的惨烈分手。这样很好，没人看出来，不至于太没面子。可以继续貌似潇洒。
但是，不同了。尽管水瓶座装着多么不在乎，看都不看一眼。可是对方说的每句话都从耳朵进去，没见出来。对方提的任何过分的要求，水瓶座统统照单全收精心尽力，
决对不会有半个不字。完全成为一个爱情的奴隶，脸上还装酷无表情，整个死要面子活受罪。
这种情况下，如果对方使点阴谋诡计，刻意疏远避而不见或是视而不见，电话不接或是哼哈敷衍等等，水瓶会给整疯了，开始会想是什么自己地方做错了，说错话 了，然后拉下面子主动讨好试探。不用多，碰壁两次，水瓶座就会有自知之明了，不会再去想是为什么会这样，也不想知道了。心里会想，原来是对方讨厌自己，不 想见到自己。明白之后，就是绝对的安静了。
这还没完，过了一段日子。对方如果突然又改变态度，水瓶座竟然能既往不咎问也不问，殷勤依旧，完全没有尊严可谈。只要能和对方开心的在一起，过去不重要，未来也不重要，面子不重要，金钱不重要，时间不重要，自己也不重要。
天平失衡，感情重重的压在心底，自己却飘在了半空。太在乎对方，迷失了自我，幸福也变得虚无。
自己都不爱，谁还会珍惜。
水瓶座一旦付出，便是彻底，不可收回。
感情投入的越多越是伤的重。
最擅长的是难为自己。不想对方难过，只好让自己难过。总是认为自己有超乎寻常的承受力，把自己想得太坚强，而把别人想得太脆弱。不知道，受伤的其实是自己，只是不知道如何表现出来。
爱，这个字对水瓶座来说，太沉重珍贵了，无法用语言诠释。一旦说出口，犹如远古的文物，被发掘出土暴露于空气中，变得面目全非，失去本来的价值。
所以，不轻易说。
只需一次，水瓶座便把一生的精力耗尽，只因执著，便落得伤痕累累。那段感情如强酸腐蚀着那颗麻木的心，穿了一个洞，再也无法弥补。时间是世界上最有力的矬子，把空洞的毛边渐渐抚平，不再搁人。每当寒风吹过，犹闻隐约凄凉的萧萧声，似挽歌。
只需一次，水瓶座便不再幻想，于是狠狠将自己摔碎，拒绝熔化拼凑。因为怕熔了记忆，怕熔了那个远远的背影，怕熔了自己千年的期盼。
之后，水瓶座依然谈笑风生，依然开朗豁达，继续着一段接一段的新感情，重复着一切，因为无法承受寂寞。
人们都说水瓶花心，见一个爱一个，水瓶座会哈哈一笑，说“哪有？冤啊！”。其实心里在滴着血，脸上却得笑的灿烂，安慰自己“我是谁啊！哪会那么弱呢！”
有人说水瓶座太冷酷太自私，自以为了不起。可是谁又了解，水瓶座的心，容量很小，只能有一个，且不具修改性。除了那个人，其他所有自动归为一种程序。
因为无法虚伪，所以甜言蜜语都吝啬给予。因为天真，所以至死之前仍在等待。因为没有勇气，所以眼睁睁放手真爱无能为力。
当看到一个瓶子在疯狂地快乐或悲伤时，请千万不要被迷惑，水瓶总是不由自主地交错操纵着快乐与悲伤。其实并不像看到的那么快乐，同样的，也不像看到的那么悲伤。只是悲伤时，喜欢带上快乐的面具，而当水瓶快乐时，悲伤又不肯轻易放过。
只有真正懂得水瓶座的人，才能看见眼底那一缕似有似无的哀伤，才能明白是什么让水瓶如此的义无反顾，是什么让水瓶变得如此忽冷忽热捉摸不定，才能体会水瓶的坚强只是竭力掩饰的脆弱。
星相上说，水瓶座往往不被所爱的人珍惜。我想，是为什么呢？也许答案就在心中，只是水瓶座的本性不愿承认而已。
水瓶座除了需要一个深爱自己包容一切的人以外，还需要一个心理医生。
几乎每个水瓶座的心底都有着一段刻骨铭心人间记忆，一个永远无法忘记的背影。
那也许只是极其短暂的两情相悦，只是一种单恋，或只是一种只存在于虚幻空间。
一切看起来是那么平静，那么和谐。
没有惊天动地，没有海誓山盟，没有花前月下，没有浪漫，没有誓言，没有温度。水瓶座的理智和冷漠，注定了任何感情永无燃点。
水瓶座不容易喜欢上一个人。有人说水瓶座对伴侣的要求太高，其实并非这样，水瓶座注重的是感觉。只是那么轻描淡写的一眼，那个人已经吸引了水瓶的所有注意力，从此目光便无法转移。
用一秒钟爱上一个人，然后再付出一生去忘记，水瓶座就是这样的试验品。
但几乎所有的水瓶都会否认在自己的身上发生一见钟情，因为一向自视清高，承认爱上一个人这钟事似乎是在侮辱自己的智商。
更多的时候是因为，连自己都没发现已经爱上。水瓶座很多时候对于感情反应非常迟钝，迟钝到每次都是最后的知情者。有时容易出现弄不清自己的感觉，不清楚自己想做什么，觉得迷惘。
在对方没有非常明确地表示感情时会退怯，觉得爱情是两厢情愿，不想勉强对方。
显得很被动，忽冷忽热，犹豫不决，极其矛盾。在没有完全确定前，决不轻易付出感情，因为怕失去。也许是缺乏安全感，也许是对自己的保护，也可以算作是一种自私。
一般水瓶座的好朋友都是经过很长世间的考察的，不仅仅是几年，而是十几年。一旦被水瓶座当作好朋友的，会赴汤蹈火掏心掏肺。
在公车上，街边，商场，水瓶老是认错人。在茫茫人海中，始终在寻找一个熟悉的身影，直到产生幻觉。
这一刻，水瓶座突然很想痛哭流涕，因为突然发现自己几近疯狂的爱上一个人，失去了理智，失去了自我。这种突如其来的感觉，很恐惧，很无助。
水瓶座不喜欢这种感觉，因为不知该如何面对。要让水瓶座主动去追逐，是件异常困难的事，在水瓶座的世界里无法承受拒绝，就是这么脆弱，无论表面上看来是多么的坚强。
水瓶座在人前总是一幅无忧无虑没心没肝的样子，不想别人看见自己的悲伤，那样会有不安全的感觉，总是在无人的地方暗自落泪。
算了，还是放在心里吧。既不用尴尬的表白然后遭到拒绝，又不会相爱容易相处难的惨烈分手。这样很好，没人看出来，不至于太没面子。可以继续貌似潇洒。
但是，不同了。尽管水瓶座装着多么不在乎，看都不看一眼。可是对方说的每句话都从耳朵进去，没见出来。对方提的任何过分的要求，水瓶座统统照单全收精心尽力，
决对不会有半个不字。完全成为一个爱情的奴隶，脸上还装酷无表情，整个死要面子活受罪。
这种情况下，如果对方使点阴谋诡计，刻意疏远避而不见或是视而不见，电话不接或是哼哈敷衍等等，水瓶会给整疯了，开始会想是什么自己地方做错了，说错话 了，然后拉下面子主动讨好试探。不用多，碰壁两次，水瓶座就会有自知之明了，不会再去想是为什么会这样，也不想知道了。心里会想，原来是对方讨厌自己，不 想见到自己。明白之后，就是绝对的安静了。
这还没完，过了一段日子。对方如果突然又改变态度，水瓶座竟然能既往不咎问也不问，殷勤依旧，完全没有尊严可谈。只要能和对方开心的在一起，过去不重要，未来也不重要，面子不重要，金钱不重要，时间不重要，自己也不重要。
天平失衡，感情重重的压在心底，自己却飘在了半空。太在乎对方，迷失了自我，幸福也变得虚无。
自己都不爱，谁还会珍惜。
水瓶座一旦付出，便是彻底，不可收回。
感情投入的越多越是伤的重。
最擅长的是难为自己。不想对方难过，只好让自己难过。总是认为自己有超乎寻常的承受力，把自己想得太坚强，而把别人想得太脆弱。不知道，受伤的其实是自己，只是不知道如何表现出来。
爱，这个字对水瓶座来说，太沉重珍贵了，无法用语言诠释。一旦说出口，犹如远古的文物，被发掘出土暴露于空气中，变得面目全非，失去本来的价值。
所以，不轻易说。
只需一次，水瓶座便把一生的精力耗尽，只因执著，便落得伤痕累累。那段感情如强酸腐蚀着那颗麻木的心，穿了一个洞，再也无法弥补。时间是世界上最有力的矬子，把空洞的毛边渐渐抚平，不再搁人。每当寒风吹过，犹闻隐约凄凉的萧萧声，似挽歌。
只需一次，水瓶座便不再幻想，于是狠狠将自己摔碎，拒绝熔化拼凑。因为怕熔了记忆，怕熔了那个远远的背影，怕熔了自己千年的期盼。
之后，水瓶座依然谈笑风生，依然开朗豁达，继续着一段接一段的新感情，重复着一切，因为无法承受寂寞。
人们都说水瓶花心，见一个爱一个，水瓶座会哈哈一笑，说“哪有？冤啊！”。其实心里在滴着血，脸上却得笑的灿烂，安慰自己“我是谁啊！哪会那么弱呢！”
有人说水瓶座太冷酷太自私，自以为了不起。可是谁又了解，水瓶座的心，容量很小，只能有一个，且不具修改性。除了那个人，其他所有自动归为一种程序。
因为无法虚伪，所以甜言蜜语都吝啬给予。因为天真，所以至死之前仍在等待。因为没有勇气，所以眼睁睁放手真爱无能为力。
当看到一个瓶子在疯狂地快乐或悲伤时，请千万不要被迷惑，水瓶总是不由自主地交错操纵着快乐与悲伤。其实并不像看到的那么快乐，同样的，也不像看到的那么悲伤。只是悲伤时，喜欢带上快乐的面具，而当水瓶快乐时，悲伤又不肯轻易放过。
只有真正懂得水瓶座的人，才能看见眼底那一缕似有似无的哀伤，才能明白是什么让水瓶如此的义无反顾，是什么让水瓶变得如此忽冷忽热捉摸不定，才能体会水瓶的坚强只是竭力掩饰的脆弱。
星相上说，水瓶座往往不被所爱的人珍惜。我想，是为什么呢？也许答案就在心中，只是水瓶座的本性不愿承认而已。
水瓶座除了需要一个深爱自己包容一切的人以外，还需要一个心理医生。
Feeling Awful
I felt really awful yesterday, not about my interview, which I think I didn't make it lah, but about my appearance. I didn't have time to put on decent makeup to cover my tiredness, puffy eys and dull complexion before the interview, but that's not the problem. I couldn't pinpoint which area I felt really awful, but I just tot I looked really really really ugly, like a troll. Big, heavy and grunt when I talked.
After a whole day of scrutinizing, I thought shaping my eyebrow might do me some good, and unwilling to get cheated again, I DIY.
The result was surprisingly neat, and the brows are almost on equal heights this time! My previous virgin attempt on shaping my eyebrows ended looking like I was giving the one brow raise look 24/7.
Now I just need a new haircut to make myself feel sexy.
After a whole day of scrutinizing, I thought shaping my eyebrow might do me some good, and unwilling to get cheated again, I DIY.
The result was surprisingly neat, and the brows are almost on equal heights this time! My previous virgin attempt on shaping my eyebrows ended looking like I was giving the one brow raise look 24/7.
Now I just need a new haircut to make myself feel sexy.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Still Jobless
Aiyoyo... Seems like many of my friends had found a job... and I'm still hanging around like a teenage kid.
When I told my mum I am going for interview, she would say, "Aiyah, just go and try lah!" in a tone so irritating. I don't know how to put it, but she seemed to have this hardcoded idea that I am choosy about my first job. I was just telling her that this Wednesday I'm going for a session, and the moment I mentioned it was a recruit agency, she start rattling off, "Just go and try, don't try how you know you don't like the job" blah blah blah the tone she used when I do something wrong.
Oh yeah, I won't forget how she snide at my poly first job, "你那个那里算， 只是你玩玩而已。" Yah right, I slogged like a cow for an ITE pay, really play play for fun only. I didn't even say a word that shows my discontentment about a that interview!!! It's not my fault if 8 of out 10 companies doesn't want me and which made me a slacking parasite.
Bleahz.... How? So difficutlt to squeeze into IT with half IT degree and a useless CCNA.
When I told my mum I am going for interview, she would say, "Aiyah, just go and try lah!" in a tone so irritating. I don't know how to put it, but she seemed to have this hardcoded idea that I am choosy about my first job. I was just telling her that this Wednesday I'm going for a session, and the moment I mentioned it was a recruit agency, she start rattling off, "Just go and try, don't try how you know you don't like the job" blah blah blah the tone she used when I do something wrong.
Oh yeah, I won't forget how she snide at my poly first job, "你那个那里算， 只是你玩玩而已。" Yah right, I slogged like a cow for an ITE pay, really play play for fun only. I didn't even say a word that shows my discontentment about a that interview!!! It's not my fault if 8 of out 10 companies doesn't want me and which made me a slacking parasite.
Bleahz.... How? So difficutlt to squeeze into IT with half IT degree and a useless CCNA.
Monday, June 23, 2008
Lucky!
Other than the spitting drama, I still feel that my life is very lucky!
I am a big and fat procrastinator, I always pushed my things to do at the very last minute, thinking that it will spur me more to complete more things. Of course, the time is just enough to achieve average results, and I would wished for one more day to give the stuff a boost!
For example, the current project I am doing now for my ex IA coy, it had been 2 months already, by right it should be long completed, but by left, I dragged,my boss also dragged, hence, I am still 10% away from finishing line.
Today was supposed to complete everything, but it was nowhere near the finished product, so I thought I just went away and submit, and made adjustments spontaneously. Who knows, I was supposed to reach at 1pm, but I left house at 12.45pm, hence, when my boss called and informed me that he wouldn't be free to go through the project with me, deep down I was happy, coz I got another day to finish! Probably the spit did me some good here?
Even though there were many times I told myself, finish earlier, more time for adjustments, still I always dragged till 2 days before then I do my stuffs. Tsk tsk tsk... Just like a habit, it takes time to mold this habit out... which I am still molding. I truly look upon people who finish their stuffs, no bring over. I truly should set a good example to Jamie, then she won't be always using my slang: "Later then I do lah!"
I am a big and fat procrastinator, I always pushed my things to do at the very last minute, thinking that it will spur me more to complete more things. Of course, the time is just enough to achieve average results, and I would wished for one more day to give the stuff a boost!
For example, the current project I am doing now for my ex IA coy, it had been 2 months already, by right it should be long completed, but by left, I dragged,my boss also dragged, hence, I am still 10% away from finishing line.
Today was supposed to complete everything, but it was nowhere near the finished product, so I thought I just went away and submit, and made adjustments spontaneously. Who knows, I was supposed to reach at 1pm, but I left house at 12.45pm, hence, when my boss called and informed me that he wouldn't be free to go through the project with me, deep down I was happy, coz I got another day to finish! Probably the spit did me some good here?
Even though there were many times I told myself, finish earlier, more time for adjustments, still I always dragged till 2 days before then I do my stuffs. Tsk tsk tsk... Just like a habit, it takes time to mold this habit out... which I am still molding. I truly look upon people who finish their stuffs, no bring over. I truly should set a good example to Jamie, then she won't be always using my slang: "Later then I do lah!"
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Drama Ma Ma
My recent life is so peaceful that I hope for some drama to happen, like: falling in love? Ha ha... Indeed, a drama did happen, but not the one I wished for. Someone spitted onto my head while I was on the up-riding escalator in Northpoint!!! TA MA DE... It was so so so traumatizing leh! Imagine you saw something whitish fell down, and it thudded on your head. Your reflex reaction was to touch that thing and it was slimy. And when you saw what was on your fingers to be saliva with bubbles somemore, could you not freak out?
I rushed to the toilet immediately to wash my hair man, damn gross!
I could not pinpoint who was that disgusting fella, but still, my mind automatically thought of some of the unwelcome people which our govt love to employ. Seriously, S'pore uncles, like my dad may spit, but they spit by the roadside or drain. This fella seriously have no sense of hygiene lor! Wah lau, spit in a shopping centre!
Jia was telling me how murky the public swimming pool was in Yishun, and it even tasted salty (coz she accidentally swallowed a few mouthfuls)! I don't recall the water was salty back when I was in primary school. This is very horrifying, that our gracious society is being polluted by people whose own country who doesn't educate its people manners!
I have smell body odor so bad that it was as if they were walking rubbish collection center, albeit unwillingly though. I have seen enough of them in my hostel who don't bath, but merely wiped themselves with a tub of water only.
Seriously, we should really enforce rules to those people who wished to come to our country. Like in Holland, foreigners who wanted to stay in the country, be in long term or short term, they were required to do a compulsory questionnaire to show how much they understand Holland's living lifestyle and culture. We ought to do the same too! Like, where do you spit if you can't find a toilet? Which side should you stick to in a walkway? How should one behave in a crowded place?
I have noticed how rude people were to me in the service area and mostly were people who are not local. No, I don't mean Malaysians, they are similar to us and in fact, their service were more sincere!
Oh man, a spit of saliva trigger so much... I also very suay lah! When I was in secondary school, I kenna someone' vomit too (I think the person was so sick and nauseous that he/she just vomited over the wall in the third floor), but luckily it fell onto my bag. Anyway, saliva on my head felt worse than vomit on my bag!
NABEH!!!! Hmpf!
I rushed to the toilet immediately to wash my hair man, damn gross!
I could not pinpoint who was that disgusting fella, but still, my mind automatically thought of some of the unwelcome people which our govt love to employ. Seriously, S'pore uncles, like my dad may spit, but they spit by the roadside or drain. This fella seriously have no sense of hygiene lor! Wah lau, spit in a shopping centre!
Jia was telling me how murky the public swimming pool was in Yishun, and it even tasted salty (coz she accidentally swallowed a few mouthfuls)! I don't recall the water was salty back when I was in primary school. This is very horrifying, that our gracious society is being polluted by people whose own country who doesn't educate its people manners!
I have smell body odor so bad that it was as if they were walking rubbish collection center, albeit unwillingly though. I have seen enough of them in my hostel who don't bath, but merely wiped themselves with a tub of water only.
Seriously, we should really enforce rules to those people who wished to come to our country. Like in Holland, foreigners who wanted to stay in the country, be in long term or short term, they were required to do a compulsory questionnaire to show how much they understand Holland's living lifestyle and culture. We ought to do the same too! Like, where do you spit if you can't find a toilet? Which side should you stick to in a walkway? How should one behave in a crowded place?
I have noticed how rude people were to me in the service area and mostly were people who are not local. No, I don't mean Malaysians, they are similar to us and in fact, their service were more sincere!
Oh man, a spit of saliva trigger so much... I also very suay lah! When I was in secondary school, I kenna someone' vomit too (I think the person was so sick and nauseous that he/she just vomited over the wall in the third floor), but luckily it fell onto my bag. Anyway, saliva on my head felt worse than vomit on my bag!
NABEH!!!! Hmpf!
Monday, June 16, 2008
I must be mad!
I actually submitted an application for XX's Search for BFF. Too full nothing to do... I watched her vid after I submitted which she listed out her criteria... which I don't make it in many areas... like cannot be preachy, not vain, must be bummer (???) etc...
Hah.. better concentrate on my job search!
Hah.. better concentrate on my job search!
Saturday, June 14, 2008
Fatal Attraction
Min recently adopted a new nasty habit: waking me up by ranting non-stop for 2 to 3 hours, which could start as early as 8am!
Gosh, bless my snores!
And recently, her habit took an unorthodox way of waking me, that was depriving me of all slumber necessities such as switching off the fan in my humid room; taking away my pillows and bolster until none left.
Yesterday was the ultimate: instead of clutching all the huggies with her less than a metre hands, she joined me in the bed, with me as HER bed! Bleahz...
Just another week to endure before she goes back to school!
Gosh, bless my snores!
And recently, her habit took an unorthodox way of waking me, that was depriving me of all slumber necessities such as switching off the fan in my humid room; taking away my pillows and bolster until none left.
Yesterday was the ultimate: instead of clutching all the huggies with her less than a metre hands, she joined me in the bed, with me as HER bed! Bleahz...
Just another week to endure before she goes back to school!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)